Kanye/Kim: I've Been There. All Sides. Part Two. TW: Domestic Violence

Part Two: Kim Kardashian and Domestic Abuse

My last entry on this story was based purely on the side from Kanye West's viewpoint as a person living with Bipolar.  However, today I want focus on the nature of how mental illness can bleed over into domestic abuse and intimate partner violence.  Presently, we are now seeing the Kanye West commit domestic abuse against his ex-wife, Kim Kardashian.

As I have been pondering the words to write this entry, I've been thinking over my past history with domestic abuse and intimate partner violence, mainly coming from that of my ex-husband, of who I was married to for two years, together for three.  My husband's rage over me, pinning me into a corner and screaming absurd accusations, throwing various items in my direction, including a telephone book that left a bruise upon my leg, circulated around his undiagnosed schizophrenia.  For years, especially during the marriage, I used that as an excuse for the abuse he perpetrated.  It was only in recently, some ten plus years since we divorced, that I can recognize that the domestic abuse stands on its own and is not made right because of his mental illness. 

Abuse is abuse, no matter the means. 

As I have been writing this, I have been scouring over the internet looking at photos of Kim Kardashian with her aforementioned ex-husband, in times of supposed "wedded bliss".  I have been thinking of past interviews she did and public posts, seemingly trying to support him and explain away his rampages as part of his mental illness, expressing his 'genius' in relation to his suffering.  At times, even when she was in the cross-fire of his social media rants, she stood by him, while seeking out ways to get him some psychiatric, emergency treatment.  

Now, I much express that I haven't paid much attention to Kim Kardashian or the world that surrounds her.  I think I have watched a bit of Keeping Up With The Kardashians once, for a few minutes only.  Looking at the photos of the two of them, they begin to tell a different story in light of recent affairs; there is a tension, forcing a sense of togetherness and marital bliss, yet the body language expresses a different, inner reality. In recent years, as Kanye West's bipolar mood swings seem to be overflowing increasingly in the public eye, I have felt much empathy for the suffering and concern that must plague her.  

She, like me with my husband, tried to stand by, support, and find ways to get him the help he needed.  

As we reflect upon the rants Kanye is currently spewing forth on social media, we are now visually seeing proof of domestic violence towards his former wife.  For me, that gives me pause to reflect and ponder.

In past years, Kanye has chosen his targets outwardly towards a variety of people, such as Taylor Swift, in a roundabout fashion.  Up until recently, we haven't seen much instances of his turning on Kim herself.  But I wonder...

Trevor Noah on Kim & Kanye

I conjecture that, at times, when he wasn't on the rampage towards someone else, if he turned that vitriol, that paranoia, that bipolar rage, on his wife, and that in actual verbal rants.  Possibly more, I cannot really say.  The times when the abuse was outwardly focused, when Kim felt more like an ally than an enemy, perhaps that was a brief moment of reprieve for her.  The reality is, abuse is abuse whatever the form and most often physical is the final result of days upon days, months upon months, years upon years of the victim being broken down with verbal insults, manipulations, gas-lighting, and other emotional and mental abuse tactics.  

Kim stood by him, explaining his actions away as related to his mental illness, until she, for the safety of herself and her family, no longer could.  Until his rages and accusations on her from Wyoming a couple years back, most likely, forced her to see how unsafe she was, that whatever the root cause, abuse is abuse and this marriage was no longer a healthy partnership.

A few days ago, in preparation for this entry, I was reading an article about Kim's appearance on Ellen promoting her new reality series.  The article was detailing how Ellen and others were remarking on how happier and at peace she seemed, commenting that Pete Davidson must be good for her.  That may be, Pete seems like a stand-up guy who is radically transparent on his journey with his own demons through his art and comedy, but I would go further that Kim's new found peace and joy comes from doing what was right for herself, her family, from standing up for herself and removing a toxic element, finally, being able to find the freedom and spaciousness to truly "Begin Again"

If you or someone you love is in a situation of domestic violence and intimate partner violence, please contact: National Domestic Violence Hotline

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