Journaling Through The Years, Ep. 96: You Can Cry

In this episode, I close out the prose on loneliness and sadness, musing on how crying is healing, feelings are not shameful, and are worthy of expressing. Then, The B@*@* is back--What the hell is wrong with Jake? Why is Michelle so jaded? Will we ever find out? Check out merch & websites they are supporting: National Suicide Prevention Hotline (24 hours): 18002738255 Text Home to: 741741 If you are struggling with your mental health, you and your life matter. Contact NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) at: nami.org nami-so.org The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/ Merchandise: https://www.bonfire.com/jesus-lt3-queer/ https://www.bonfire.com/timekeys-band... https://www.bonfire.com/timekeys-fan-... https://www.bonfire.com/recovery-sexy Listen to the FanGirlHour: https://anchor.fm/fangirling

Excerpt from Journaling Through The Years, Ep. 96

Life Model History: Julie Manet #artmodel #impressionism

Allow me to introduce to you, the darling 'daughter' of the impressionists, Julie Manet, born November 14th, 1868, to parents Eugene Manet, the younger brother of the acclaimed Edouard Manet, and to mother, Berthe Morisot. Both her parents were deceased by the time of her 16th birthday, first with her father, a few years later her mother. At her father's passing, she was taken under the tutelage of poet Stephane Mallarme, who when her mother passed, became her legal guardian. She was the favorite model of many impressionist artists, especially her doting mother, who portrayed much of her growing up, her Uncle Edouard Manet, and Pierre-Auguste Renoir. Her diary, Growing Up With The Impressionists, published in 1979, recounts her childhood life with her mother, then life afterwards as an orphan, living in a Parisian apartment with her cousins, traveling with Renoir, Degas, and others, sharing their lives together, their thoughts on current events at the time such as the Dreyfus Affair. Her diary continued with the preparations for her marriage to Ernest Rouart, painter and engraver, which was held in Passy, and was a double ceremony with her cousin, Jeannine Gobillard who married Paul Valery. Julie and Ernest would have a happy life together and together would have three children, Julien, Clement, and Denis, who inherited the works of Berthe Morisot.

Journaling Through The Years, Ep. 95: Return To Reality #relivemychildho...

This episode leads me to sharing a prose revealing my lonely little heart, how I was struggling to cope then & yet see now that I had resources I never fully believed I deserved, knew I had. Check out merch & websites they are supporting: National Suicide Prevention Hotline (24 hours): 18002738255 Text Home to: 741741 If you are struggling with your mental health, you and your life matter. Contact NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) at: nami.org nami-so.org The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/ Merchandise: https://www.bonfire.com/jesus-lt3-queer/ https://www.bonfire.com/timekeys-band... https://www.bonfire.com/timekeys-fan-... https://www.bonfire.com/recovery-sexy Listen to the FanGirlHour: https://anchor.fm/fangirling

Journaling Through The Years Excerpt Ep. 95: Return To Reality

Journaling Through The Years, Ep. 94: Once Or Always? #relivemychildhood

In this episode, I read a prose entry that sparks a discussion on missing my summer camp friends & the reasons in my life. I reflect on how I use the pronoun "we" to detract from actually stating the personal impact of my loneliness, then discuss how coming into my junior year of high school was stressful due to the occurrences of the end of my sophomore year. Then, I discuss the value of always with you friends & those once in a moment encounters. Hint: They both are important. Check out merch & websites they are supporting: National Suicide Prevention Hotline (24 hours): 18002738255 Text Home to: 741741 If you are struggling with your mental health, you and your life matter. Contact NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) at: nami.org nami-so.org The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/ Merchandise: https://www.bonfire.com/jesus-lt3-queer/ https://www.bonfire.com/timekeys-band... https://www.bonfire.com/timekeys-fan-... https://www.bonfire.com/recovery-sexy Listen to the FanGirlHour: https://anchor.fm/fangirling

Life Model History: Kiki #aliceprin #queen #montparnasse

The Queen of Montparnasse or rather, Kiki de Montparnasse or simply Kiki, given to her from a lover's pet name, Alice Ernestine Prin, born October 2, 1901, died April 29, 1953, was a model, a chanteus or bar/lounge singer, an actress, a painter, a memoirist, and most notably a liberated woman who lived her life on her own terms. Alice's birth was shrouded in shame, born illegimately, she spent much of her childhood in poverty with her grandmother,who she dearly loved. At age 12, her mother sent for her to live with her in Paris, in order to work and provide more income for herself and her then live-in male partner. Alice began working as a linotypist, as well as other degrading, harsh jobs. Although her love of self-decorating and art, often ended her various employments. At just 14, she posed nude for the first time, of which when her mother found her, she was called a prostitute and kicked out. Destitute and homeless, Alice would find a way to earn a living solely through nude modeling. Although a favorite of many famous artists, her strongest connection was with her most intimate relationship with the visual artist, Man Ray, who photographed, filmed, and created art with her through numerous works available today. Her loving family of friends followed her coffin to her final resting place at Cimetière parisien de Thiais, where her tombstone simply read: "Kiki, 1901–1953, singer, actress, painter, Queen of Montparnasse".Having a lifelong struggle with alcohol and drug dependency, Kiki left this earth at the age of 51 on either March 23 or April 29, 1953. For more about Alice Prin, as well as other art models in history, and to learn what it means to be a life model, check out my course: "Life Model 101" at cafegirlproductionsinc.com

Journaling Through The Years, Ep. 94 Excerpt Only: Once Or Always? #reli...

A short series on this channel where I read through the journals I have been writing in since I was old enough to hold a pencil & then share my thoughts on how it shaped my understanding of myself and helped me find meaning in the various stages of my life. See playlist: Journaling Through The Years for all episodes!

Journaling Through The Years, Ep. 93: The Past Links Today #ravencliff #...

In this entry, I share an entry written in the fall of my junior year of high school, wherein I reflect on missing my summer camp friends and the unconditional love given contrasted with the feeling of lonely awkwardness coming back to school after my depression breakdown & the loss of friendship with my so-called best friend dating princess bride boyfriend. As I ponder how at the time, I felt more a kinship and connection to my camp friends, I realize now the true family was the ones I had been with every day of my life since preschool, my high school class. But, this leads to a reflection on how both are vital and important, the special unique once in a a moment connections coupled with the every-day growing together experiences & how both of these are what made me who I am today, linking my past to today. Check out merch & websites they are supporting: National Suicide Prevention Hotline (24 hours): 18002738255 Text Home to: 741741 If you are struggling with your mental health, you and your life matter. Contact NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) at: nami.org nami-so.org The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/ Merchandise: https://www.bonfire.com/jesus-lt3-queer/ https://www.bonfire.com/timekeys-band... https://www.bonfire.com/timekeys-fan-... https://www.bonfire.com/recovery-sexy Listen to the FanGirlHour: https://anchor.fm/fangirling