Friday, December 31, 2021

All Is Well 2021 to 2022

 


The ending of a year brings both celebration and an intense pondering, even though in recent years the idea of resolutions are seen more as a mere joke than taken seriously.  For my part, I choose each month to create vision boards with the first one of the year a bit larger than the others.  The reality of it is that the ending of the year is a death, even as I write this out my office window swirls snowflakes falling on ground floor already covered with the cold white, that which was alive is now dormant preparing for the new life to come later in the year.  And so too, within we feel this ending, but such as in all aspects of life, with every ending, a new beginning.  The seasons of nature are also reflected within that of human nature.  

Way back to 2016, many chose to curse a year, waving their fists in the air in anger, even in recent times for me, where it became dark with the pain of losing a loved one felt too intense that I wanted to cry out in anger, I was met with the truth that birth and death, beginning and ending, are a part of life.  In every ending, there is a new beginning.  With the four beloved souls I have lost this year, Charlie Robinson from Night Court, Markie Post from Night Court, my dear childhood friend, Christina, and, of course, Cafe-Girl's queen forever, Catherine "The Rani" Hansen, I feel the message they sent from beyond not to berate a year for their passing, but to celebrate the love we shared together in our season.  With every death, there is a rebirth, for those that have departed as well as for us who see life beyond their passing.  Yet, even though they be absent in body, I feel them with me still, in a stronger, more poignant way, which leaves me to truly believe that 'death is not an ending, but a shift in the relationship.'  A new season of life is starting with the passing of the old.

That being said, I also want to touch on the inner reasoning behind the anger at the pitfalls that have come, seemingly so much, in the last few years.  Yes, so many curse the years and trending on twitter is the "FU" to the year while John Oliver blows it up on TV, and again, with all the tumult both politically, socially, physically, many seek to cling to some form of knowing, yet it is in these ever changing times that we cannot ever truly know, try as we might.  Thus, the fighting emerges with one another over what is correct and what is incorrect, yet there truly is no knowing.  Embrace the blessed uncertainty, my friends, for with this we find the ability to experience life in all its fullness, through the lens of a childlike sense, not getting bogged down by the horrors, but realizing into each season, tears will fall yet joy shall return.  I admit I do fall prey to the worry and anxiety of the heart, feel myself wanting to rail against that which I cannot control, yet I believe we are all here on this planet to transform, evolve, and to help others do so.  

With that meaning, as you travel into 2022, take with you, dear heart, that truly All Is Well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dS3L2R8ugYI  

All is well that ends well
And in the end I'll be with You I know
All is well that ends well

And so all is well with my soul

Thursday, December 30, 2021

Lilly #mentalhealthmatters #bipolarawareness


Lilly Langford is a girl living with Bipolar Type 2, hoping to show the world that one can be successful and thrive while dealing with mental illness.  
Stars Amelia Rose as Lilly
Written & Directed by Lia Elizabeth Rose Dugal
**Content Warning: Adult language, Suicidal Ideation, Self Harm**
Hit the reminder button!  

Monday, December 27, 2021

Journaling Through The Years Episode 26: Beauty Outta Pain


This week I share some entries from the end of my freshmen year dealing with my first ever heartbreak from my first boyfriend. I reflect on how that pain brought about a new appreciation for the beauty in the world, once the tears had dried. I ponder how each heartbreak and tragedy I have experienced has made me more stronger, more resilient, and more capable of seeing beauty, loving deeper, and making a better difference in the world. Dedicated to My Monte Bird!

Sunday, December 19, 2021

Journaling Through The Years, Episode 25: Ghost Stories, Summer Love, & ...


In this week's episode, I begin a new journal (back in high school), I begin with my 1994 NY Resolutions, which includes hoping for my first kiss before I turn 16 (spoiler alert: that resolution did happen before 16 but not completely as written), I share some short stories about a weird bunch of friends I met in childhood in my neighborhood...kinda. I close with a dedication to my VC Fam & nothing bad better happen or I'm never ever dedicating another vlog to anyone ever.

Monday, December 13, 2021

Name Changes

 


The dawn of a new year is upon us which always causes a time of reflection mingled with the air of celebratory mirth.  Increasingly this year 2021, I have found myself in a phase of evolution, moving further away from who I once thought I was and what I allowed to impact, including the labels I chose for myself and others deemed appropriate, now looking inward and discovering more truths that need to be revealed at last, no longer hidden.  Thus, the evolution stirs a decision to formally change my identity, not just of the words attached towards me that identify but that of my business, Cafe-Girl Productions, Inc.  

As a child, I had a great love for the show, Night Court, as mentioned many, many times, at length, in a variety of capacity.  Once again, when I was a mere young thing, I wished so intensely that the actor, Harry Anderson, was in fact my father, imagining that my name was Elizabeth.  Not sure why I chose that name as a youngster, it just came to me and I claimed it.  Throughout all of my life, I have returned to Elizabeth, even presently, as I go about my day outwardly as Lia, inwardly I feel what life would be like as if I am her, as if all of my life I lived as her and not in the world I did outwardly.  Its as if I can see everything she did, her childhood home, her friends, each memory is vivid and understood within me, somehow.  Parallel universe, perhaps? Who can tell.  But, what I am starting to understand is that as I begin to heal more, I find myself uniting with her more deeply, so that it's less an escape from reality into safety, but rather we are both one.  Thus, I have decided to adopt her identity within mine by adding the name "Elizabeth" to my moniker.  In a very real sense, I am fully engaging every part of me and bringing to the surface, no longer needing to hide or flee.  




More than the inner need of my heart to be true to myself and my calling, I have discovered the powerful truth of the meaning of names and the vibrations heard linked together to impact my soul's truth more deeply.  I have yet to make the official change, for now, legally I am still "Lia Rose Dugal", but the legality of its fullness will come intime.  For now, the change has been made official on social media alone.  


The next revelation came as a shock to me but when it arrived in its fullness I was surprised that I had not recognised outwardly its need.  Over the last two years, I have discovered and am clearly defining the brand and emphasis of my business and entrepreneural endeavors.  It came upon me as a deep revelation that I always knew within that the focus of my business is that of the thriving artist, rather to help artists of every variety seek and love their thrive.  Working with a business advisor, I have discovered that the "productions" name, once fitting for a film company alone, does not fully encompass all that Cafe-Girl seeks to achieve.  My business partners and I have been tossing ideas back and forth that feel more fitting and have narrowed it down to either "Cafe-Girl Thriving Artists, Inc" or "Cafe-Girl Artists, Inc".  Our brand slogan is simply, "Love Your Thrive" so we were debating whether the usage of "thriving" needs to be within the main name itself.   

So, first I want to be a person and businesswoman that hears and takes into consideration those she works and cares for, honoring their input and seeing its validity.  So, in a sense, we decided upon "Cafe-Girl Artists, Inc", but in my head I kept referring to "Cafe-Girl Thriving Artists, Inc", without any effort it flowed from within and then without.  

Throughout these last two years, I have entered fully into recovery, through private therapy as well as self help books galore.  A large facet of this is in committing to fully love and honor myself, being able to receive love from others without feeling an obligation to give back.  Being free to receive is not selfish as I am still a person that gives and loves freely.  Furthermore, there is a necessity within myself to honor my inner voice.  I have toyed with this, feeling that if I voiced my desire for the "thriving" within the name, I would discredit the input and voice of my business partners.  However, the resounding truth kept echoing within my heart, these are true friends, who love, honor, support, and, above all, truly see me, as I truly love, honor, support, and, above all, see them.  Thus, by me laying out my heart to them on this issue, they will not feel unheard or devalued, but will see the need to continue to assure I am valued by them.  Nothing is set in stone as far as the business name change, nor does it have to be deciding upon in this moment, the appropriate name will make itself known in its perfect time.  

In the synchronicity of the changes of identity for myself and business, I have discovered once again the fullness of knowing and being true to oneself within and allowing that to spill outwards.  That, in fact, is the true pathway towards being a thriving artist.










                                                        Rise

    I won't just survive
Oh, you will see me thrive
Can't write my story
I'm beyond the archetype
I won't just conform
No matter how you shake my core
'Cause my roots, they run deep, oh





Sunday, December 12, 2021

Journaling Through The Years, Episode 24: Not Alanis KnockOffs: All 90's...


In today's episode, I discuss how my writing impacted and was influenced by my thought processes. I detail the difference between what it means to be a relationship addict versus the forever propensity I have had towards polyamory, & how I am moving forward in my life in being intentional in my relationships, leaving behind the Disney/Hollywood style of romance. Throughout the video, I highlight different aspects of 90's alternative music, a side note: they are all awesome, not only Alanis Morrisette.

Sunday, December 5, 2021

Journaling Through The Years, Episode 23: Don't Blink 182, Fundaze, & F...


Today I start a new journal, yay, no more whale of a time. I reflect once more on the influence of my high school years on Camp, how the reality of being and loving unconditionally someone with whom you just met has shaped my core and my life throughout, I reflect on how my becoming a Fundie (minus the fun) was a tool to shut love out, and note that 23 is the worst age ever, why, because everyone hates you because you are 23. Thanks for watching!