Friday, November 28, 2014

Lots of Gratitude on Thanksgiving 2014



As I sit here, sipping my coffee, just waking up, my mind tries to wrap itself around just how much I have to be thankful for...

I can't help letting my mind go back to two years previous, when I was married...life was overwhelming stressful at the time, and when the holiday came, I was home with a husband who slept the day away on the couch while I (ever one to try & make holidays majorly celebratory) attempted to cook the whole meal...

Days leading up to this, I had been going from work to rehearsal to home where I would be either yelled at for something I didn't do or given the silent treatment..And now, on Thanksgiving, the only other person in the room besides me slept on the couch, without offering to help...while in California, at my parents' house, a huge family gathering was taking place and I was more alone than I had ever been....

That feeling of loneliness & despair is something I am very grateful to not have any longer. Now, I have much to be thankful for:

1.) Michael, my life partner, boyfriend, best friend who 'gets me', makes me laugh, loves me, loves being around me, enjoys the same things as me, listens to me, appreciates me....I am really glad this isn't a fling!

2.) my cats, one of which snuggled with me this morning with my arm around him, and the other of which is snuggling down on my chest at present, making it rather difficult to type...however, for that I am thankful, if I didn't have it, well life would be a little less beautiful

3.) My family, both blood-related & extended

4.) My wonderful friends, so many to name, for the past friends who are still with me, thank you for being there & believing in me throughout all these crazy years, for the present friends, thank you for your presence in my life, you encourage me to grow & follow my heart & dreams in many ways daily, make me laugh a lot, & I look forward to many many years to come

5.) I am thankful that I am living the "real life", the life I had always dreamed of, hoped for, but never really thought existed....

6.) For my freedom in so many many ways....

7.) For my ever-growing spiritual growth, that deepens & guides me no matter how diligent I am

8.) That I am finally paying off long-standing debt & moving forward with financial freedom independence

9.) That I am finally able to focus on my true calling & "career path" and I foresee fruitfulness both financially & spiritually in this area in days to come

Community Theatre is Life!

Or, maybe just theatre in general, however, I have not found my way into other forms of theatre, as of yet.  That is to come, very soon.

But, I digress...

I believe the very nature of theatre reflects that of the basics of human nature and not just in the final showcase of the production seen on opening night and the rest of run, that of which the viewing public sees.

But, what they commonly don't see is what goes on backstage? Sometimes referred to as the backstage drama or in some cases, more often that than, backstage comedy.

From the audition to the beginning of the rehearsal process,  actors and techies go into the endeavor with the best of the intention, not really knowing each other but with an already growing fondness building, as in, "here we go, we are in this together" sort of thing.

But, something happens along the way...well, human nature, for that matter.  People butt heads, tempers can fly, we do our best to look the other way, bite our tongue, turn our cheek for the sake of the show...all the while grumbling amidst ourselves.  Its true.

It always happens, its inevitable this process of relationship building during the rehearsal and run, why? Because we are only human.

However, that shouldn't be cause to throw in our towels and surrender to that inevitability.  Just as theatre reflects life onstage, so to should it reflect it offstage.  I feel a strong desire to push passed those inadequacies or flaws of humankind, and find in our mutual goal a commonality, a sense of purpose, of finding the good in others.  For its in those sacrifices off-stage that help build not only a better performance for those involved but also for the audience, but helps build character and endurance for a better community at large and for the world.  Maybe even, the Universe.

So, yeah, community theatre is life, as it really is, both onstage and off, and as it should be.


Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Music For The Heart

Maybe its just me, but I feel like the popular songs of recent have made a major shift in evolving into a more positive feminist mindset.  Starting in the 80's with such singers as Debbie Gibson and Tiffany, to name a few, the songs appeared to be more focused on finding a guy which made one happy and feel whole, the opposite of which when the relationship ended, one's entire sense of self was shattered.

Only In My Dreams

Now, I must confess that despite the lack of feminine strength, I hold a strong liking for the work of the great, Debbie Gibson, mostly originating from freshman year of college, when my best friend and I would sit in my dorm room listening to a Gibson tape I had, in between the times we drank a 40 and watched Sesame Street.  But, however, I do recognize now the heartbreak and loss of identity in losing one's relationship.  In addition, look at the songs like "Total Eclipse of the Heart" where the female singer croons over the blinding loss of her guy, who offers her hope if she would just "turn around".  Meanwhile, the majority of male singers wrote and performed songs with more of an overall significant message about life, spirituality, of sense of defining one's self, such as "Burning Down The House" by Talking Heads or "Losing My Religion" by REM.

Then, the 90's came, the time of my life where I came of age.  I remember listening to songs by artists like Jewel, Norah Jones, and Natalie Imbruglia.  Similarly, there were the so-called angry female singers such as Alanis Morissette, Tori Amos, and the like.  These women, talented in their own right, seemed all in their own way to perform songs, not only of heartbreak and loss, but with a slightly angry tone blaming the guy for leaving but still offering the idea of loss of self from their leaving.  Consider Jewel's song "Foolish Games" or even Natalie Imbruglia's famous hit, "Torn" as examples of this.  Even, Alanis Morrisette's "You Oughta Know" which seemed to have a sense of empowerment still had the lingering effects of "its all your fault that I feel this way" thus giving away a woman's sense of power, strength, and individuality.  Remember the "Spice Girls" who danced around scantily clad singing "If you want to be my lover" showing men how to be their boyfriend, in a mock empowering way.

Foolish Games

Meanwhile, the male singers of that era sang songs that typically tried to manipulate woman with the false hope of forever love, such as the Boys to Men, "I'll Make Love To You".  So while the girls were faithfully dedicating their hearts to the men, whether they were together or not (look at Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You") simultaneously giving up their power, men were using these same words as a ploy to sway woman.  Even more disturbing, there were some male singers and bands, such as Aerosmith who performed songs such as "Crazy" about girls who had gone bad through making the choice for their own individuality.  (I confess I loved that song and the music video of it.)

But, now when I listen to the radio today, there seems to be a shift in the subject matter of what female singers are crooning, the message they are trying to get out.  Anything from singing on topics connecting to political standpoints to talking about how a woman no longer needs a man to thrive.  Even more so, female singers are crooning about how men are chasing after them while they actively pursue their own calling.  Its the men, like Bruno Mars, singing about how they messed up and lost an amazing woman through their own fault.  Female singers like Jordin Sparks and Lady Gaga, among others, seem to reflect this shift, not only singing songs with a deeper sense of empowerment that fights against prejudice such as Gaga's "Born This Way":

Born This Way

But, also (and this one is particularly meaningful to me) Sparks sings power into a woman's decision to move away from an abusive relationship and seek healthy love and a successful life in her song, "Tattoo":

Tattoo

I don't know, maybe its just me, after all, that as I listen to these songs, my interest in them reflects my own evolution of feminism and empowerment, in not letting men and society as a whole define who I am as an individual.

In the end, I still love listening to the songs of my youth and of the present, no matter what the meaning.  As a singer myself, music has a way of getting into our soul, helping us to heal and find meaning for our current life situations.

So, readers, if you are out there, what do you think? How has the popular music of your life influenced your life, both positively and negatively? This inquiring mind wants to know!

For inspiration, I leave you with one of the greatest female recording artists of our time, the amazing
Madonna:

Madonna





Monday, November 17, 2014

Ain't I A Woman?

With the onslaught of the transgender movement, both in the public eye and in my personal life with many of my friends (of whom I fully support), I've been doing a lot of thinking about the nature of gender, traditional, societal, and natural.  I recently learned of a new term called "cis-gender".  Looking it up, I learned it was a term referring to one's understanding of self as pertaining to the gender they were born with, the sex they were given at birth.

In college, I had a lot of classes that touched on this, discussions about whether gender and sex are purely biological or that of roles enforced by society, or even both.  I've come to the conclusion of the latter, even with the openness of the trans-movement, mostly pertaining to who I am as a woman and a human being, where I fall into place in society and, more importantly, as a sense of understanding of myself.

I've fought long and hard with being a woman and wanting to assert myself in this world.  I've felt ashamed of my femininity in past, thinking that showing this part of me was somehow a sign of weakness.  Yet, I realized recently that this is what I am, I am 100% girl, naturally, spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and yet this no way takes away from my strength and abilities.  In fact, this adds to it.

I think an attack of feminism now comes in the idea that one cannot be a feminist if one falls into the categories of femininity enforced by society, or rather what we view as societal womanly roles and actions.  Yet, I feel completely comfortable and even whole dressing up, making myself pretty and girly.  I also feel completely comfortable in sweatpants, jeans, t-shirt, no make-up.

The point is, being a girly-girl in the exterior in no way takes away from my strength and ability to fight for women's rights inwardly.  In fact, being the way I am is another way I can help to bring equality for woman everywhere, by saying, I'm pretty and sexy, yes, but I also have brains, talent, a sense of humor and I'd rather use those to assert myself than anything else.

So, the answer to the question on the title is: Yes, I am a woman.  And proud.

So, to all of my women-kind out there, whether you are cis, or trans, or tomboy, love yourself, be proud of who you are both inside and out, because its in that way we make a difference, its in that way we fight inequality, continue the quest for gender equality, and, in fact, win.  By truly knowing ourselves and having pride in who we are, we finally win!

This PSA brought to you by Lia Rose Dugal, Inc.

Saturday, November 15, 2014

The Madness of The March Hare!!!!

In my prior life, I was a Butcher's wife in the slums of London in 1855.  After my husband passed, I was left with the business and our 6 little children.  With not a lot of money after the funeral expenses were paid off, I took to hunting down the local stray animals, and sometimes those pets of local families, and slaughtering them to sell.  The rich buyers of my goods always liked the best meats and finest delicacies of that fashion.  I made up names for these deceased pets or rather said they were of different animal origins...but I was being watched.  By a witch, who seeing my evil misdeeds and lying ways, punished me by magically whisking me away to this strange place I would come to know as Wonderland.

Upon arriving, my form changed from human into a sort of animal form, that of a Hare.  It was early March at the time, which prompted being called the "March Hare" by a local hatter, mad as he was, who happened to find me first, when I was wandering in the woods confused on my first day of arrival.  He took me under his guidance, or control, taught me the ways of Wonderland, shared his glue, and helped me along the path to madness.  Finally, all hope lost of ever returning to my former life and sense forgetting there ever was one, I set up house and home, building an abode whose resemblance looked uncannily liked my new physical form.  So, beautiful it was, both inside and out, that I, in my madness, decided it was too perfect to live in so set up my existence in the outside, with a lovely tea table laid out for myself and company, mainly the Mad Hatter.



One day on his walk to my house, he found a little Dormouse, stranded, soaking wet, and afraid.  He brought her to me and I took her in, sort of as a motherly role, although without any degree of affection but more out of duty or a remembrance of past child-raising.

Then, one fateful day while at a concert held in the Red Queen's honour, my madness in full swing, the Hatter made a grave error in angering Father Time while performing a song.  In punishment for this crime, he and I (for I was deemed accomplice) were whisked immediately and without any ability to protest to my tea-table for an eternal 6:00 tea time, never to move forward or even backward.


However, in my duranged mind, the sameness of life seems somehow comforting and I find peace, in some ways, with the routine, my mind doing its best to blank out the negative side-effects of my current life situation.  All seems to be going well with my life neatly arranged, always the same and what I can control until one day, one not so good day, when a little girl shows up...

Find out what happens and see more of my crazy adventures and those of my friends starting next Thursday, 11/20 at the Bellview Grange's Theatre Convivio's production of "Alice in Wonderland".

Alice In Wonderland Event Invite

Lewis Caroll's "Alice In Wonderland" is adapted by Evalyn Hansen.  It is directed by Richard Heller and stars McKenzie Baratta as Alice.  The show runs from November 20th through December 6th at Theatre Convivio in Ashland, Oregon.




Friday, November 14, 2014

Meet Alan Cummings!

Oi!  Its me, Alan, I'm just a regular chap from London, that is until I found myself here in Wonderland.

How did I get here, you ask? Well...that's a rather interesting tale, indeed.  See, I was visiting my Grand Aunt Stella's estate and while hunting with my Grand Uncle and my Pa, one of the beagles ran off, Missy, to be exact.  Always loved that girl the best.  Well, she ran off and I chased her down...down is right, right down this magical rabbit hole, turned out to be quite an adventure after that.

Times being what they were and needed to earn my keep until I could afford a ticket back to London, I took the position as head gardner to the queen, however, I did not know when taking the position all that would entail...such as being flattened and turned into a card, truly, the #2 of Spades, mind you!



Oi!  And, to make matters worse, I'm put in charge of these two schmucks known hereafter as #5 and #7, you can't even imagine the trouble they've caused me!

See more of my crazy adventures and those of my friends starting next Thursday, 11/20 at the Bellview Grange's Theatre Convivio's production of "Alice in Wonderland".

Alice In Wonderland Event Invite

Lewis Caroll's "Alice In Wonderland" is adapted by Evalyn Hansen.  It is directed by Richard Heller and stars McKenzie Baratta as Alice.  The show runs from November 20th through December 6th at Theatre Convivio in Ashland, Oregon.


Thursday, November 13, 2014

Meet The Fish!

Hello there, Allow me to introduce myself; my name WAS Sir Edward Lightfoot, from the mystical land of Archelia, where I was the main Lord of the land, for a time, that is, until---

Anyway, the community was a small fishing village, where I made my wealth with the taxing of the townsfolk (perhaps a little too much, I do admit now, regretfully).  With this money, I had myself knighted, even though I never fought any battles.  I lived this life in a sense of pride and entitlement until one fateful day---

On that day, a mysterious, old, traveling woman came through town selling her wares of magic.  I wanting to have that magic for myself, but she, knowing I meant this for evil gain, spirited me away to Wonderland as punishment for my evil deeds.  Upon coming into that land, I was made personal footman to the Red Queen, something that would have caused great pride, if I hadn't been turned into a sort of half-man, half-fish creature as further punishment.

The frog-footman, a distant relative of mine from somewhere, is my counterpart in service to the Duchess.  I do not like him, as this stems from my past life with him in the land of Archelia, however I do not remember this life whatsoever.  I only know that I hate him still but thankfully feel myself superior to him because of who I serve in comparison with his mistress.

See more of my crazy adventures and those of my friends starting next Thursday, 11/20 at the Bellview Grange's Theatre Convivio's production of "Alice in Wonderland".

Alice In Wonderland Event Invite

Lewis Caroll's "Alice In Wonderland" is adapted by Evalyn Hansen.  It is directed by Richard Heller and stars McKenzie Baratta as Alice.  The show runs from November 20th through December 6th at Theatre Convivio in Ashland, Oregon.


Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Lorelei the Lory!

My name is Lorelei the Lory.  I am a little girl of about 9, although some may say I resemble a bird.

One day when my mother was on her way to town, she forbid me to leave the house whilst she was gone and not to go out to play with my friends.  After she had left, I grew quickly bored with my surroundings and my toys and thought nothing else but wanting to be outside playing with my friends.  Mischievous as my temperament is, I decided to once again "forget" my mother's orders and go out to the wide world to find my friends.

As karma would always have it, I got caught in some kind of a freak flash flood made by this ginormous little girl (who I had never seen before) with my friends.  When we finally found the shore, we were soaking wet and very cold.

My friend, Dory the Dodo, came up with this very fabulously fun new game called the "Caucus Race", which she promised us would help us dry off.  So, the race began with mass confusion and ended almost as soon as it had started and we were all dry and even better had all won!

All given prizes, strange as they were, were dutifully handed round by the very large little girl.  Once given out, we tasted the treats which I made me choke and almost die, having been saved by my best buddy, Eddy the Eaglet who patted my back.

All seemed well and it appeared as if the flood had been my only punishment until nosy Miss Marcie the Mouse accidentally told my mother all about our adventures that day.

See more of my crazy adventures and those of my friends starting next Thursday, 11/20 at the Bellview Grange's Theatre Convivio's production of "Alice in Wonderland".

Alice In Wonderland Event Invite

Lewis Caroll's "Alice In Wonderland" is adapted by Evalyn Hansen.  It is directed by Richard Heller and stars McKenzie Baratta as Alice.  The show runs from November 20th through December 6th at Theatre Convivio in Ashland, Oregon.


Monday, November 10, 2014

Being An Empath Is Not All Its Cracked Up To Be!

All my life, I had this strange ability to feel what others were feeling without them saying anything. At times, I could even know their thoughts.  However, others' thoughts were never as clear to me as their emotional state, as in their was always doubts within that realm but oddly enough never with the emotional content.  Many times in my life this got me into trouble because, knowing what I knew intuitively, I felt this urge to help others, often turning into an accidental confrontation that led to a the friend striking back in defense, denial, and with them calling me "crazy" with a time of silence to follow.  Almost always, I was misunderstood and left feeling hurt, alone, and confused.  Yet, I always knew I was somehow right, even if I had nearly always handled it wrong.

Psychics, or rather false ones, and other sudo-new age false teachers, give this kind of connection or ability a strong discredit, using it for their own gain and not for the benefit of others.  This, inevitably, leads to downplaying the gift, as mere "sympathy" or worse over sensitivity on my part, or even worse, lies from the devil.  

It wasn't until a few years back when someone mentioned the word "empath" that I finally found some hope, some understanding for the way I was made, the gift I was given.


em·path
ˈempaTH/
noun
  1. (chiefly in science fiction) a person with the paranormal ability to apprehend the mental or emotional state of another individual.


A light of joy went on!   I finally understand why I was the way I was and finally knew how to deal with all of it, and at last had a community, however unseen, that I could relate to and feel not so very alone.

Finally, I understood that I didn't have to "save anybody" but could trust in the power of prayers and intentions for others' wellbeing and end result of their issue.  This freed me to finally enjoy this emotional and very beautiful gift.  
I have since met people who brag about "being an empath" with an air of pride and ego, yet I find some uncertainty in this.  Being an empath, for me, has been a very long, confusing journey.  As one with this gift, it is not something that has caused pride, at times.  But, at last finding understanding of myself, I accept this role, this divine gift (for it is that) with humility and gratitude.