So, yeah, we have made it through almost 3 months of twenty-twelve, so how's it all been for you? So far, has it been what you expected? Had any amazingly powerful experiences that have transformed you, well, maybe....blessings from above, the divinity of love that knows no bounds...well, have you?
It seems like there is always some kind of speculation about certain years, some meaning different spiritual backgrounds can find significance in, whatever that may be, I mean, no disrespect. Some look forward to the rapture, whether imminent or in some distant future....some look for some other futuristic society or shift of consciousness. Whatever it may be, all believe in some kind of awakening, new beginning...what do you believe? What do you hope for?
Sometime around 2006ish, my friend with the name of the Elite university told me that in 2007 the world would end, in a sense, some major event would occur that would change us all...sadly, I must admit, this statement did not excite me, but however, worried me. Well, obviously, 2007 came and went and we are still here....but are we?
However, for me personally, my major breakdown and life changing event happened during 2007, a new beginning, an awakening, a divine encounter which brought about a new identity and however troubling and hard it may have been, I look back on it, with I guess, a sense of accomplishment.
And remember way back to the dawning of 2000? Y2K, ring a bell? We were told to expect some major breakdown of technology, everything going haywire, planes falling from the sky, perhaps...and did that happen. Maybe, in some alternate reality!
So, now we are here in 2012, can you believe how fast time travels? And we wait for the fateful 12/21/12, do you believe something will happen? A fresh start for mankind or the end of it all? Or both? We shall have to see. Or perhaps, this year will bring about a cataclysmic change in our own personal lives, and maybe that's all we should be hoping and waiting for...because, as I have learned, the only person we can be responsible for, and truly know, is ourselves...like, we all have to be accountable for ourselves.
So, whatever the future holds, I hope and pray for myself and all of you that it will bring something new, something transforming...whether or not we have to go through some kind of hardship to get there.
Peace, love, and Chocolate cookies to all of you!
Friday, March 30, 2012
Friday, March 23, 2012
A Desolate Place
God is more real to us in desolate places; he reveals himself to us in our brokenness and humility, in our times of sunshine, we sometimes become filled with false pride that hinders us from truly being aware of his presence, always with us, and less receptive to his still small voice...
These last few weeks I have been working and driving, working and driving, seemingly driving more than working, and yet feeling the increasing stress as the price of gas rises higher and higher. As we all rightly know, we've got bills to pay and the money we fork over at the gas tank seems to make that inaccessible.
In the midst of the rush, I became too lost in my own frantic mind to remember to wait on the Lord, as a result, the stress began to overwhelm me. I found myself, more tense, more angry, and even suicidal. Yes, the time of the month grew closer and closer but even still the lack of God-time increased the amount of anxiety, I do admit.
As the close of that job came, I found time to sleep, meditate, and, most importantly, curl up in the Word of God and in all of this, I felt the stress lighten, the mind clear, and the heart found rest. Truly, I must remember, as we all shall, that the physical health rests not just this earthly realm but, most importantly, in the spiritual, which in turn, gives us the nurturing health in the emotional and mental.
Truly, when we are broken, in the desolate places, we found the comfort of the Lord. So, trust, abide, and wait on his love and grace.
Patience, for he is coming to you. And yet, is always with you.
These last few weeks I have been working and driving, working and driving, seemingly driving more than working, and yet feeling the increasing stress as the price of gas rises higher and higher. As we all rightly know, we've got bills to pay and the money we fork over at the gas tank seems to make that inaccessible.
In the midst of the rush, I became too lost in my own frantic mind to remember to wait on the Lord, as a result, the stress began to overwhelm me. I found myself, more tense, more angry, and even suicidal. Yes, the time of the month grew closer and closer but even still the lack of God-time increased the amount of anxiety, I do admit.
As the close of that job came, I found time to sleep, meditate, and, most importantly, curl up in the Word of God and in all of this, I felt the stress lighten, the mind clear, and the heart found rest. Truly, I must remember, as we all shall, that the physical health rests not just this earthly realm but, most importantly, in the spiritual, which in turn, gives us the nurturing health in the emotional and mental.
Truly, when we are broken, in the desolate places, we found the comfort of the Lord. So, trust, abide, and wait on his love and grace.
Patience, for he is coming to you. And yet, is always with you.
Thursday, March 15, 2012
The Beauty of Childhood
A little too much gingko yesterday and so much got done, laundry, brownies, healthy dinner, garbage, litterbox....but truly I have found much success from taking my gingko biloba, my memory has definitely sharpened!! Funny thing is, I think I took an extra one because I forgot if I had taken it or not, so what does that say? I don't know...
So, finally, when I laid down to sleep, my mind started drifting off with the swirling cacophony of dreams, somehow I got on those firecrackers we used to have when we were younger, the ones that sparkle and you have to shake in order to keep lit. Which reminded me of a 4th when I was a child, about two or three ( a fact that the gingko is working, if I can remember that!), my mom or dad handed me one of those sparklers and I didn't know what to do with it, until they told me to shake it, so it went out pretty quick-style. The fact is, they didn't tell me before they handed it to me that I needed to shake it, but probably in their eyes, as most adults think, that I didn't understand...and I have to admit that my thought of children is that they need a little extra instruction, and perhaps, as a teacher, that is what is needed in some categories, as shall we say "contemporary education"...but in other ways, the child is actually more present, more aware, and more pure than what we are...and isn't that what we all strive for? (I am speaking, in regards, to all spiritual backgrounds and interests!) In my perspective, it is what Jesus was referring to when he said, "let the little children come to me", as only the child is pure enough to completely yield themselves to loving him fully, honestly, and completely.
But, what I remember about that moment, is that I was completely in the moment with the sparkler, I was completely absorbed in the beauty of the sparkling light, something that those around me were unable to see...because, perhaps, in my childlike innocence and faith, I was able to see...and in that moment, I was closer to my creator than I am in these days!
I always had an innate interest in the spirituality, even in a family that claimed to be agnostic, even atheist. And, yes, I was the only child raised without a religious education, in some degree, yet they only one that openly sought out any form of aspect of the divine. Perhaps, it was because of my creativity, or my affinity to the craziness, but the spirit-world always called to me. I was intrigued by nature and once kneeled in the midst of a fairy ring ( a ring of mushrooms) and felt the magic soaring through me. I remember always believing in a God, saying he lived in the clouds, but He was there. As a child, I read the Narnia books and believed wholeheartedly in that other realm, used to search for it in my backyard. As I grew, I read The Tao of Pooh and Deepak Chopra. I studied Buddhism, after we traveled to Thailand when I was a child. Later on, my sister gave me a book on Astrology (Linda Goodman's Sun Signs) and I read it from cover to cover, would discuss it with my friends. This led into Wicca and I started dabbling in spells and rituals that awakened my understanding of the spiritual and natural realm, and how they combined. Because of this, I was constantly aware of the unseen. I could understand and relay meanings of my friends' and my own dreams, with accuracy. A friend got me interested in tarot cards, and that too helped understand myself, my future, and the direction I needed to take in choices and relationships.
Through all of this, God called to me, and mostly through nature. He called me closer and closer to the sparkling light I saw that 4th of July with the firecracker. It was his unconditional love that I desired and it was what I found in Jesus. Please know this isn't a plug for Christianity; I honestly see myself, in a sense, as a Pagan-Christian, and with that, I must emphasize my need and craving for Jesus. In my heart, I cannot see life without him. Through all my travelings in the spirit realm, His love was calling for me and it was to him I sought after; that endless love and forgiveness. Yet, I haven't forgotton or truly given up my so-called Pagan background, it is what enriches and clarifies, in some fashion, my love for the divine.
My message for all of you, whatever your spiritual inclination, is to give Jesus a try. Please don't let yourself be offended by him and please know that whatever bad thing you have done that may keep you from him, please know that he forgives you and loves you where you are at, no matter what you have done or been through...and that is my prayer and hope for myself, that I would remember. And, also that presence of mind and heart that I had as a child, that childlike wonder and faith, would manifest itself in my life in my now grown-up world. Whatever your background, insights on spirituality, faith, remember that beauty of childhood that awakened your senses to the other realm...
This next Tuesday, my husband and I celebrate our first annivarsary and truly it has been a year of growth, self-discovery, and connection. Bill is my best friend, lover, partner....and I cannot imagine walking through this life without him by my side. Marriage has helped me understand deeper the love my creator has for me, also the forgiveness. As I hang on every word and gaze at my husband, I strive to remember the love that He (or she) has for me, the love that knows no boundaries, no restrictions, and that will always and has always been there...to hang on his word and to gaze on him daily. I pray that that divinity will be between myself and my husband and fill our house, our lives, our individual paths...that each day both of us would awaken with that peace of mind and unending love....that is the gift He gives to me and I pass onto my love, my friends....and all the world
So, finally, when I laid down to sleep, my mind started drifting off with the swirling cacophony of dreams, somehow I got on those firecrackers we used to have when we were younger, the ones that sparkle and you have to shake in order to keep lit. Which reminded me of a 4th when I was a child, about two or three ( a fact that the gingko is working, if I can remember that!), my mom or dad handed me one of those sparklers and I didn't know what to do with it, until they told me to shake it, so it went out pretty quick-style. The fact is, they didn't tell me before they handed it to me that I needed to shake it, but probably in their eyes, as most adults think, that I didn't understand...and I have to admit that my thought of children is that they need a little extra instruction, and perhaps, as a teacher, that is what is needed in some categories, as shall we say "contemporary education"...but in other ways, the child is actually more present, more aware, and more pure than what we are...and isn't that what we all strive for? (I am speaking, in regards, to all spiritual backgrounds and interests!) In my perspective, it is what Jesus was referring to when he said, "let the little children come to me", as only the child is pure enough to completely yield themselves to loving him fully, honestly, and completely.
But, what I remember about that moment, is that I was completely in the moment with the sparkler, I was completely absorbed in the beauty of the sparkling light, something that those around me were unable to see...because, perhaps, in my childlike innocence and faith, I was able to see...and in that moment, I was closer to my creator than I am in these days!
I always had an innate interest in the spirituality, even in a family that claimed to be agnostic, even atheist. And, yes, I was the only child raised without a religious education, in some degree, yet they only one that openly sought out any form of aspect of the divine. Perhaps, it was because of my creativity, or my affinity to the craziness, but the spirit-world always called to me. I was intrigued by nature and once kneeled in the midst of a fairy ring ( a ring of mushrooms) and felt the magic soaring through me. I remember always believing in a God, saying he lived in the clouds, but He was there. As a child, I read the Narnia books and believed wholeheartedly in that other realm, used to search for it in my backyard. As I grew, I read The Tao of Pooh and Deepak Chopra. I studied Buddhism, after we traveled to Thailand when I was a child. Later on, my sister gave me a book on Astrology (Linda Goodman's Sun Signs) and I read it from cover to cover, would discuss it with my friends. This led into Wicca and I started dabbling in spells and rituals that awakened my understanding of the spiritual and natural realm, and how they combined. Because of this, I was constantly aware of the unseen. I could understand and relay meanings of my friends' and my own dreams, with accuracy. A friend got me interested in tarot cards, and that too helped understand myself, my future, and the direction I needed to take in choices and relationships.
Through all of this, God called to me, and mostly through nature. He called me closer and closer to the sparkling light I saw that 4th of July with the firecracker. It was his unconditional love that I desired and it was what I found in Jesus. Please know this isn't a plug for Christianity; I honestly see myself, in a sense, as a Pagan-Christian, and with that, I must emphasize my need and craving for Jesus. In my heart, I cannot see life without him. Through all my travelings in the spirit realm, His love was calling for me and it was to him I sought after; that endless love and forgiveness. Yet, I haven't forgotton or truly given up my so-called Pagan background, it is what enriches and clarifies, in some fashion, my love for the divine.
My message for all of you, whatever your spiritual inclination, is to give Jesus a try. Please don't let yourself be offended by him and please know that whatever bad thing you have done that may keep you from him, please know that he forgives you and loves you where you are at, no matter what you have done or been through...and that is my prayer and hope for myself, that I would remember. And, also that presence of mind and heart that I had as a child, that childlike wonder and faith, would manifest itself in my life in my now grown-up world. Whatever your background, insights on spirituality, faith, remember that beauty of childhood that awakened your senses to the other realm...
This next Tuesday, my husband and I celebrate our first annivarsary and truly it has been a year of growth, self-discovery, and connection. Bill is my best friend, lover, partner....and I cannot imagine walking through this life without him by my side. Marriage has helped me understand deeper the love my creator has for me, also the forgiveness. As I hang on every word and gaze at my husband, I strive to remember the love that He (or she) has for me, the love that knows no boundaries, no restrictions, and that will always and has always been there...to hang on his word and to gaze on him daily. I pray that that divinity will be between myself and my husband and fill our house, our lives, our individual paths...that each day both of us would awaken with that peace of mind and unending love....that is the gift He gives to me and I pass onto my love, my friends....and all the world
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