Twenty years ago today USA went to war with Iraq because Saddam Hussein? Al Quada? 911? WMDs? Oil? Twenty years ago today I met a group of friends at a cafe who challenged my budding religious beliefs, discussing pagan understandings over bottomless cups of coffee and wine, a guide revealing my heart reaching out to reclaim.Twenty years ago today I locked eyes for the first time with the man I would eventually marry...ten years ago today I received divorce papers from him. The best revenge I could give him, and myself, was knowing now that it was the beginning of my path to real freedom.
Throughout my life, flowers have been representations of deepening my understanding of my spiritual growth and reality of my connection with the divine in nature, that of, both the masculine and feminine, the god and the goddess. In my years of romantic inclinations then later in the "Jesus Freak" years, the rose held strong significance and meaning upon my heart. Numerous meanings based on the different color of the flower, yellow for friendship, red for passion and romance, white for divine. The moment I "accepted Jesus as my savior", way back when in the flush of the newness of that religion, I imagined two long stem roses placed in my outstretched palms. Later on, caught up in the throes of singing in unison with the other churchgoers, I would imagine rose petals descending from the heavens upon all, imagining it to be a representation of the Holy Spirit. This figurative image in my mind may have been connected with the Christian religion at the time yet the rose has a long history of imagery among other spiritual practices and in literature. For me, it was a personal identification of connectivity with that which I longed for within, healing and unconditional love.
Just remember in the winterFar beneath the bitter snowsLies the seed that with the sun's loveIn the spring becomes the rose
I have always found the daffodil to be as much enchanting for my soul. Seemingly lighter, almost fairy and ethereal with its brighter colors of yellow and white, the daffodil embodies to me an awakening to new life, a beginning of spring emerging, light overcoming the darkness. Such a symbol was deepened unto my life when my soul sister, Katy, driving down from Portland for my wedding day, parked along the highway, a somewhat perilous undertaking, to pick daffodils for my event. A memory I cherish regardless of the memory of the darkness of the marriage as her love and loyalty towards me is reflected through the golden flower.
I have always found the daffodil to be as much enchanting for my soul. Seemingly lighter, almost fairy and ethereal with its brighter colors of yellow and white, the daffodil embodies to me an awakening to new life, a beginning of spring emerging, light overcoming the darkness. Such a symbol was deepened unto my life when my soul sister, Katy, driving down from Portland for my wedding day, parked along the highway, a somewhat perilous undertaking, to pick daffodils for my event. A memory I cherish regardless of the memory of the darkness of the marriage as her love and loyalty towards me is reflected through the golden flower.
The reality of the flower emerging from the dark soil, as in Bette Midler's song, is one that reveals to me the awakening, the coming, the reality of the Goddess Ostara. Ostara, so-called by the pre-Christian Germanic spiritual practices, is the Goddess of Spring. She is known as the bringer of light, fertility, of new birth and new growth. The British Saxons translated her name to Eostre, later morphed into Easter. Then, the Christian holiday honoring the resurrection of Jesus has its connections in Pagan roots. In fact, with the story of birth and resurrection, so to, begins with the pagan tradition of the birth of the light during Yule, winter solstice, or even Jesus' birthday celebrated on December 25th, traveling towards the renewal and resurrection of life in the Spring. A long held belief and practice expanding all spiritual and religious practices throughout the ages. Noteworthy to honor regardless of spiritual or religious affiliation, or none whatsoever. The acknowledgment of the joy of feeling the return of the warmth of longer days is one that all can fully appreciate and find benefit.
Through it all, the moments of depression, gratitude, contemplating that in every ending there is always a beginning, thus this day, March 20th, Spring Equinox has always been and will always be a monumental day of transformation, release, and beginning anew, what lies ahead, I can only imagine, but if history is an indicator, then it will be what leads me further into authenticity. For me, being authentic means being real and accountable to every facet of myself, acknowledging all of me, faults and all, appreciating all the good and the bad that has come across my path, as it made me who I am. For freedom cannot become until acceptance of all, especially the darkness, once done, the cleansing occurs and true light emerges from within.
Twenty years ago today USA went to war with Iraq because Saddam Hussein? Al Quada? 911? WMDs? Oil? Twenty years ago today I met a group of friends at a cafe who challenged my budding religious beliefs, discussing pagan understandings over bottomless cups of coffee and wine, a guide revealing my heart reaching out to reclaim.
Twenty years ago today USA went to war with Iraq because Saddam Hussein? Al Quada? 911? WMDs? Oil?
Twenty years ago today I met a group of friends at a cafe who challenged my budding religious beliefs, discussing pagan understandings over bottomless cups of coffee and wine, a guide revealing my heart reaching out to reclaim.
Happy Equinox! Happy Ostara
Happy anniversary to me.
We turn to the Maiden and creation begins
It's a time for things growing and time now for flowing
A time now for sowing the seeds of your dreams.
Beautifully written! The journey, which is our life, offers so many paths. It's all about learning. I love that you are taking it head on. Cheers, old friend!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Mr. J!
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