Gluten-free and Purple Monkeys

Okay, I know, funny title!

Well, my body feels a lot more functional this morning.  A few weeks ago, I went to the doctor for another matter, and asked to take a blood test for celiac's disease, and found out on Thursday that it tested positive.  Yes, I have celiac's disease.  This is a fact that I have had suspicion over for at least the past 10 months or so, maybe longer.  And, it just makes a whole lot of sense now.

For starters, the borderline diagnosis.  As I really dug deep into myself and mined the depths of God's wonders, I started to really understand myself and really see that the one reason that I was diagnosed with the BPD was the anger, and yes, the supposed rotten manipulation.  And, really, when I looked at the thought process behind the manipulation, there wasn't anything really vindictive about it, like a borderline would.  (And, I want to be clear that I have no ill-will towards borderline but an amazing heart towards them, for I carried that diagnosis for at least a year and dealt with the amazing amount of stigma attached to it, not fun!).  So, I could eliminate that part of it right away.  But, what about the anger?  Well, from studies of myself and of the symptoms of Bipolar, I learned that bipolars also have an intense amount of anger so really that's part of the new mindset as well.  And, then once I started learning to love myself and appreciate my body for what it was, instead of having a fear of weight gain, and started learning about nutrition and whatnot, the anger started to dissipate.  Then, about that time, my therapist and I did an analysis of my symptoms, we found that I didn't really have this condition.  A relief, I thought I was cured.  But, those in the psychiatric field disagreed and thought if there was no symptoms, then I must have never had it.  And, after careful consideration and learning about my physical condition and effects of "poor diet", I came to realize this.  I believe now that the anger stemmed from the gluten, because really when I eat foods this week, as I unknowingly did this week, my, perhaps, blood pressure rises and I struggle with all these anger thoughts.  So, now truly, I was never a borderline.  Yay!

Another thing, close to this, that I have been thinking about, something I have been pondering.  I finished the book of Romans this week and found this verse fascinating.  (Now, first I must explain that I have always learned that the heart is wicked and the root of sin.)  But, what I have really come to believe over these last few years is that the mind is the center of the universe, in a sense, and controls the heart.  And, even our physicality (okay, our flesh, our skin suits, our bodies) are a possible cause of evil.  And, really, it does say in the Bible that its what goes out, not what goes in, okay, but follow me here: The world is evil.  The forces of good and evil wrestle in us and around us, so in this society, has what we have learned to put into our bodies caused this root of craziness?  Have we been forced into insanity?