Needed Protection...
On the way home tonight, a song came on the radio that wrenched at my heart. The words of the song escape me now but listening to its cheesy lyrics I was struck by the image in my mind of my first dance at my wedding; the dance with my first true love. A painful thought today because I truly believed in my vows to love, honor, cherish in sickness and in health til death do us part. I never thought I would be who I am today, so much as a 'young divorcee' with a crockpot and a vegetable garden and a cat for company (and yes, two loveable she-roomies who do make the hard times endurable with their love and laughter).
But, even through the, at times, crushing pain, I know I must move on, that there are others out there for me to love and others who want to love me. The trick is, through the slow recovery process of moving one step in front of the other, picking up the pieces of my shattered glass heart, am I willing to let love in again? Am I willing to experience new life?
It is a fact of my existence that I hold no regrets for my marital vows. I made the decision to marry my ex-husband because I truly love him with all my heart and believe he loves me as well. My focus now must be not on the past but to move forward in faith for what love and experience the future path shall bring; enjoying every moment as if it was my last.
The main theme of my life is to never cease to tell someone you love them; life is short and is to be lived to the fullness, complete with an open heart ready to experience where the spirit leads.
To my first love, I express my undying and eternal love; no matter how far apart the separation or the nature of our future relationship, this truth will never die nor fade. I love you forever and always!
But, I must move on. I must allow my heart to be filled with love again and I must continue to move onward with my calling.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RKwIHfZcU9A
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