Journaling Through The Years, Episode 34: Kosovo & Monica

Happy Valentine's Day! Ah, the day of amore! And, I'm still in Firenze, Italia. I start out by a description of my spring break to Switzerland to see my friends, as well as share about my trip to Strasburg, France, and finish up by reflecting on my experience being ever so close to the skirmish/war in Kosovo in 1999. President Clinton's Address to the Nation on Kosovo (1999) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLzPVYTf2oc My Love Journey: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byp0lTRUtdk&t=406s The True Story of Valentine's Day: https://artistthriving.blogspot.com/2022/02/the-true-story-of-valentines-day.html

The True Story of Valentine's Day

 

Well, today is the day, February 14th, 2022, the day of the candied hearts, red roses, and all things romantic.  However, does it have to only relate to that of romantic love, but can it be a day reflective on the supreme meaning and power of that four letter L word?

With that said, I would like to share a bit of the history surrounding this day and how it came to be how it is known today.

The Catholic Church recognize three different martyred saints from their historical records with the name Valentine or Valentinus.  The first tells the story of a young priest who lived during the time of Emperor Claudius II, most famous for outlawing marriage in favor of needing young men for military purposes, and this priest Valentine secretly wed for young lovers, as he saw this decree as unjust and unfair. When Claudius discovered this, Valentine was beheaded.  However, some believe that Bishop St. Valentine of Terni was the one that gave Valentine's Day its name and origin.

Next, many believe that Valentine was a priest that aided in helping prisoners escape from Roman prisoners.  Legend tells that when he was imprisoned he sent a note to a young girl he had fallen in love with, possibly the jailer's daughter, and signed it "From Your Valentine", thus the origin of the Valentine's card.

But, moving away from Christianity, we find ourselves in the Pagan origin of the day, that of "Lupercalia", celebrated on the 15th of February.  Indeed, some believe that Valentine's Day was an attempt by the Catholic Church to christianize this Pagan holiday.  Lupercalia is celebrated as a fertility festival in dedication to Faunus, the god of agriculture, and to the founders of Roman, Romulus and Remus.  As the festival commenced, members of the festival, an order of the Roman priests, would gather at sacred cave meant to be where Romulus and Remus had been cared for by the she-wolf or lupa.  The priests would then sacrifice a goat for fertility and a dog for purification.  Once done, they would strip the goat's hide, dip it into blood, then take to the streets slapping crops and women with the bloodied hide.  Women were not fearful or angry by this but believed that this would help them become more fertile the rest of the year.  At the close of the festival, the women would place their names in a great urn, drawn out by eligible bachelors leading to partnership and marriage.  So, if a priest hits you with a bloodied goat hide, ladies, love and babies are on their way!

For more information on Lupercalia, click here: https://journeyingtothegoddess.wordpress.com/tag/lupercalia/

Love In The Time Of Covid

 

As we head into the weekend famously known as the weekend of love, for some excitement of sharing the special day with their beloved, for others sadness over feeling the loneliness, (even more so this year with the Covid19 restrictions in place), so thus in today's entry I want to examine how the influence of media, film, tv, and music, has shaped how we view love and hyped the commercialization of February 14th. 

First off, a brief run-down on the history of February 14th, or rather, the mid-point of February.  It stems back to 496, with the Roman holiday of "Lupercalia", as the start of spring and a day when young boys would pull the name of a young girl out of a box, signifying that they were boyfriend and girlfriend during the festival which would sometimes lead to their marriage. 

Later, Christianity co-opted the celebration, as per usual, by honoring St. Valentine.  It is said that Emperor Claudius 2 had marriage outlawed due to his belief that it made men bad soldiers.  The priest, Valentine, found this ban severely unjust (rightly so) and thus decided to secretly wed couples.  When the Emperor found out about this, he had Valentine condemned to death. During his time in captivity, Valentine fell in love with the jailer's daughter and before his death sentence on February 14th, he penned a note to her signing it, "From Your Valentine", thus it begun.

Years tumbled forward and we have Hollywood and American society once again culprits of co-opting the holiday, Love Itself, for commercial purposes.  And, yes, many may dive into the Hollywood love and romance stories, the chick flicks as they are famously referred to, and that is just fine.  (Full transparency, season two of Cafe-Girl Productions, Inc romantic comedy, Nate & Laura & How They Met premieres this Sunday evening, so I guess I'm on that bandwagon as well.  A little bit.) However, there is nothing inherently wrong with watching those types of stories, if one can remember that it is just that, a story.  Furthermore, love is a universal need, perhaps more valuable to our soul well-being than food, water, and sleep.  So, it makes sense then that absorbing this content would help to fill that desire.

But, my friends, these movies, TV shows, songs, and such did a great disservice to our souls.  Because not only did they preach that love is the ultimate answer and solution to our despair, but kept it one-sided focusing on the aspect of love that is Eros-related, i.e. Romance.  This media filled our tender minds and hearts with the desire for a grand love story of epic proportions complete with the meet-cute meeting, the rivalry and/or mistaken confusion, the grand race down the street in the freezing rain, confession of undying 'happily ever after' forever.  We leave the movie theatres, turn off the TV, the radio, wipe our eyes, and wonder when...starry eyed hopes lead to anguish in disappointment, bitterness in anger.  Hollywood forcing us to remain as Eponines but all too often end up as Fantines, never the Cosettes we were born to be. 

For even though romantic love is important, it is not the only part of love that is needed for our wholeness and completion.  

During this time of Covid-19, I find myself relishing the minute details of each holiday, regardless of whether another will view my decorations and festivities or not.  And, this weekend is no different in that aspect.  For me, it's in fondly recalling the Valentine's Days of my past, the elementary school parties, like in first grade when we had the massive flood and had to go home early, my friend, Corinne, carting off my special V-Day treats, the first middle school dances, the first date and first kiss, and, you know, everything else.  But, it's more than just a celebration of the memory and romantic love, but a celebration of all aspects of love, as I joyfully dart about town flitting from friends' houses, dashing away as I leave their cutesy little cards on their doorsteps.  

Love is multi-layered, multi-faceted, but all too often we forget that when this weekend tumbles around, we forget the excitement we had in childhood over the holiday, of just giving little gifts and cards to our classmates.  Recall that, hold those special memories whatever they may be, grieve if you need to be, for even heart-break and good-bye is a facet of love, release expectations of the shoulds from society, Hollywood anything else, and, finally, just be with yourself, truly experiencing the fullness of love.

That is, Love In The Time Of Covid. 

The Rose

I would love to hear your thoughts, including your love story experiences, both positive and negative, in every aspect of love, romantic, platonic, career focused, parental.  Share how these relations transferred your heart, mind, and soul, despite whatever heartbreak came.  

The Thriving Artist is a subset of Cafe-Girl Productions, Inc.  You can find the links beneath this entry if you want to know more about Cafe-Girl!

Top Ten!

Top Ten Reasons Why Michael Meyer Has My Heart:

And the countdown begins...

10.) Your eyes.  They're blue.  A light blue...

9.) The hat.  You know, the cute one.

8.) The way you pronounce "hands" and other words with that "a" sound.

7.) Your "alternate" personalities that only I see.  I feel honored that you are comfortable
revealing those inner selves.  Also, and more importantly, your love of and passion for theatre, ie Acting as an art not just a business.  Thank you.

6.) You readily accept all my friends.  You put up with and are trying to get into Doctor Who. And my cat.  Especially my cat.

5.) Your cat, Leo.  I like him.  So, I keep you around so I can see him.

4.) You sleep well with others.

3.5) And by sleep I mean...

3.) The way you can make me laugh & laugh the same way at all my jokes, no matter how many times I repeat them.  I like that.

2.) The way your hand feels in mine.  Also, being in your arms, your kisses, just you, you. You!

1.) For this...

You are real.  You are a dork.  You are a real dork.

Because, I love you & I am so glad we are together.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSCLCiNv4XA

A Sleepless Night Leads to...

A Sleep-Drunk Lia the very next day...

Last night, I had trouble sleeping, quite a few factors took part in my version of "Sleepless In...or rather..."Awake in Ashland".  One being my bed is not so comfy and the second being I was worried about the boy.  No further comment on that, only that what it made me realize is that now that guy has gotten so close to my heart and so meaningful in my life that when he feels low, I feel it, I mean, really feel troubled in my soul.  I was fighting the urge to call him, not out of any need of my own, but to let him know I loved him, was there for him if only he let me...but I know more importantly he needed his sleep but I am so thankful for the fact that the very nature of our relationship is built on openness in communication based on our own personal needs (if one needs space, we just ask without making a big fuss about it).

However, the words from the song below kept floating around in my brain as I tossed and turned mind racing fighting to sleep...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UW67JolwoJY

But, to continue, I think that the thing that I love about this relationship is that I still feel that excitement waiting for him to show up, when he walks in the door, the first hug and kiss in the morning...that hasn't truly faded after these many months of courtship, for that I am truly grateful.

So, shall I try define the meaning of love? At present, my foggy, sleep-deprived brain can't grasp too much at words long enough to truly string together a clear thought (I apologize for these ramblings), so for now I won't try for that...I only wish to say to leave with the below song and picture attached, concluding what I was saying before my love for Michael is enough, for every moment I spend with him, leaves me wanting more...

So, how about it, Mikey, how about "A Kiss To Build A Dream Upon?"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-Oz5Xmi2ew

V-Day Approaches!

Lately, I have been thinking about that funny little thing called "love", the four letter word that we can never truly explain but know without a doubt its real when its real...Its the age old question, really, what is love?

As I was going through all of this, it dawned on me that the fateful 14th fast approaches, so maybe thinking about the Love concept isn't so strange this time of year? (Remember my New Years' Eve entry?)

So, less than a week away from the "heart-shaped" day, and here I am in a new relationship and four exes stalking the town (well, one ex-husband, two ex-boyfriends who are now friends, and one "I don't know what the eff he is so I'll just call him an ex and be done with it" guy), and I think, why? why do we fall in love? Looking back over all my tragedy with past love affairs, why have I allowed my heart over the past 6, 7, 8 months (Has it been that long?) to fall in love with this new guy? (I'm asking in all seriousness now.)

I only know, without a doubt, what I told my dear friend, Monica, today in a text:

"he is like the best guy i have ever been with, helps me be comfortable with me."

I know that, in my knower, to be true.  And, that is part of what scares me.

It scares me that I am starting to feel I can trust someone again, ever more than before actually.  It scares me to see my life with this new person, if possible.  It scares me to think that I may lose another lover...and this one would really hurt.  Because this one is REALLY my best friend.

Falling in love with Michael has been the strangest form of "love at first sight"; when I first looked at him, really looked at him, that day in a cold warehouse community theatre when he broke down in front of us, something about him touched me, really made a difference.  I saw him.

As my character from Light Sensitive, Edna says , "When you fall in love with someone, there's a moment when you take a picture of that person with our hearts, an emotional snapshot, and if you're lucky, if you're very very lucky, that person you fall in love with will always resemble that snapshot."

Here's hoping this guy doesn't change, but always resembles that vulnerable, passionate man I fell in love with.  Because it was truly love at first sight, I just didn't know it then.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZqcWwYPHuQ