Love In The Time Of Covid

 

As we head into the weekend famously known as the weekend of love, for some excitement of sharing the special day with their beloved, for others sadness over feeling the loneliness, (even more so this year with the Covid19 restrictions in place), so thus in today's entry I want to examine how the influence of media, film, tv, and music, has shaped how we view love and hyped the commercialization of February 14th. 

First off, a brief run-down on the history of February 14th, or rather, the mid-point of February.  It stems back to 496, with the Roman holiday of "Lupercalia", as the start of spring and a day when young boys would pull the name of a young girl out of a box, signifying that they were boyfriend and girlfriend during the festival which would sometimes lead to their marriage. 

Later, Christianity co-opted the celebration, as per usual, by honoring St. Valentine.  It is said that Emperor Claudius 2 had marriage outlawed due to his belief that it made men bad soldiers.  The priest, Valentine, found this ban severely unjust (rightly so) and thus decided to secretly wed couples.  When the Emperor found out about this, he had Valentine condemned to death. During his time in captivity, Valentine fell in love with the jailer's daughter and before his death sentence on February 14th, he penned a note to her signing it, "From Your Valentine", thus it begun.

Years tumbled forward and we have Hollywood and American society once again culprits of co-opting the holiday, Love Itself, for commercial purposes.  And, yes, many may dive into the Hollywood love and romance stories, the chick flicks as they are famously referred to, and that is just fine.  (Full transparency, season two of Cafe-Girl Productions, Inc romantic comedy, Nate & Laura & How They Met premieres this Sunday evening, so I guess I'm on that bandwagon as well.  A little bit.) However, there is nothing inherently wrong with watching those types of stories, if one can remember that it is just that, a story.  Furthermore, love is a universal need, perhaps more valuable to our soul well-being than food, water, and sleep.  So, it makes sense then that absorbing this content would help to fill that desire.

But, my friends, these movies, TV shows, songs, and such did a great disservice to our souls.  Because not only did they preach that love is the ultimate answer and solution to our despair, but kept it one-sided focusing on the aspect of love that is Eros-related, i.e. Romance.  This media filled our tender minds and hearts with the desire for a grand love story of epic proportions complete with the meet-cute meeting, the rivalry and/or mistaken confusion, the grand race down the street in the freezing rain, confession of undying 'happily ever after' forever.  We leave the movie theatres, turn off the TV, the radio, wipe our eyes, and wonder when...starry eyed hopes lead to anguish in disappointment, bitterness in anger.  Hollywood forcing us to remain as Eponines but all too often end up as Fantines, never the Cosettes we were born to be. 

For even though romantic love is important, it is not the only part of love that is needed for our wholeness and completion.  

During this time of Covid-19, I find myself relishing the minute details of each holiday, regardless of whether another will view my decorations and festivities or not.  And, this weekend is no different in that aspect.  For me, it's in fondly recalling the Valentine's Days of my past, the elementary school parties, like in first grade when we had the massive flood and had to go home early, my friend, Corinne, carting off my special V-Day treats, the first middle school dances, the first date and first kiss, and, you know, everything else.  But, it's more than just a celebration of the memory and romantic love, but a celebration of all aspects of love, as I joyfully dart about town flitting from friends' houses, dashing away as I leave their cutesy little cards on their doorsteps.  

Love is multi-layered, multi-faceted, but all too often we forget that when this weekend tumbles around, we forget the excitement we had in childhood over the holiday, of just giving little gifts and cards to our classmates.  Recall that, hold those special memories whatever they may be, grieve if you need to be, for even heart-break and good-bye is a facet of love, release expectations of the shoulds from society, Hollywood anything else, and, finally, just be with yourself, truly experiencing the fullness of love.

That is, Love In The Time Of Covid. 

The Rose

I would love to hear your thoughts, including your love story experiences, both positive and negative, in every aspect of love, romantic, platonic, career focused, parental.  Share how these relations transferred your heart, mind, and soul, despite whatever heartbreak came.  

The Thriving Artist is a subset of Cafe-Girl Productions, Inc.  You can find the links beneath this entry if you want to know more about Cafe-Girl!