Journaling Through The Years, Episode Thirty One: On Hold With Me

In this episode, you get a peek into my life as a business entrepreneur start up person as we wait on hold with the OR business registry, fun times with cool waiting on the line rockin' music. Meanwhile, I continue through the life as a study abroad student in Italy, and somehow, end up discussing relationship addictions, the cause, the way out, leading to intentional relationships. For more information on the links mentioned in this episode: Subscribe to TimeKeys for the upcoming episodes of MindSick & TimeSick here: https://www.youtube.com/c/TimeKeys Find out how to listen to the FanGirlHour, including the upcoming episode with Taylor as well as past episodes, here: https://anchor.fm/fangirling

Subscribe to this youtube channel for Dracula! Also, check out their website: www.wanderlusttheatre.co Listen to Multiamory podcast: https://www.multiamory.com/

A Message From The Undead, Count Dracula

Blood Suckers Found In Ruch, Oregon

 

Kate Vangeloff as Dracula

Photo Credit: Wanda Borland

Nestled in the heart of the Applegate Valley, cradled by majestic mountains, lies Longsword Vineyard, the playing grounds for Wanderlust Theatre Company, now showing their second production of Dracula, an original adaptation expertly written by Kate Vangeloff and Jae Unker.   The show opened this weekend with roaring success, despite rain-fall, leaving audiences with a gasp for breath and a thrilling experience.

Jae Unker as Lucy and Kate Southern as Mina

Photo Credit: Lia Dugal

Although a well-known story, this adaptation is revealed in true Wanderlust fashion, known for its experiential, cinematic experience of live theatre, wherein the audience travels from set to set with the characters as the story unfolds, keeping the audience rapt attention in enthrallment.  

Nathan Green as Dr. Van Helsing

Photo Credit: Wanda Borland

The play is divinely directed by Nathan Green and Madeline DeCourcey in a way that highlights the natural talents and character work of each performer.  In a very real way, there is no star or diva with Wanderlust and in this production itself, but the ensemble is just that, the true starring role.   Each performer births their character allowing the revealing of the story according to their viewpoint, as in life, we only know the story according to our perspective.  Then, in a true to life fashion, the characters' experiences weave together as the action unfolds, seemingly coming together in love and opposition sometimes simultaneously, as they find a way to overcome the challenges they face.  Relationships merge, then collide, showcasing that where there is love, there is  always the constant of both light and dark.

Tim Coatney as Johnathan Harker, Kate Southern as Mina, Tiffany Schechter as Dr. Jack Seward, and

Abby Brown as Arthur Holmwood

Photo Credit: Wanda Borland

Then again, the story of Dracula itself, although fanciful, lends itself to holding up a mirror to our very own psyches, as we realize that the propensity for good or for evil lie within each of us.  In a very real sense, there is no black or white, but all of us have within the nuance of shades of grey.  Even Dracula herself is not wholly evil, nor is Johnathan Harker or Dr. Van Helsing purely good, but all have motives and reasonings that force them along the journey of their life to whom they become and whence they end.

Alayha McNamara as Victoire, Amelia Rose as Lilith, Jae Unker as Lucy, Tiffany Schechter as Dr. Jack Seward,

Nathan Green as Dr. Van Helsing, Abby Brown as Arthur Holmwood, and RuRu Painter as Carmilla

Photo Credit: Lia Dugal 

Faced with the daunting task of putting on a play during a pandemic, Wanderlust Theatre found a way to use this Covid19 reality in a way that lends itself well to the telling of the story.  From limiting audience numbers grouped into pods to the use of masks on the actors to reflect the health risks of the year 1893, the time of the story taking place.  

Tiffany Schechter as Dr. Jack Seward and Brandon Kinsey as Quincy Morris

Photo Credit: Lia Dugal 

With a range of talent of a varied experience level, Wanderlust Theatre spends its rehearsal time in intensive training, from the heightened physical of their "boot camp" that prepares the actor for the terrain of their playing field to extensive character work and activities that help deepen the actor's understanding of the craft of acting, highlighting the belief in living truthfully in the given circumstances of the story with oneself and the other characters.

Alayha McNamara as Victoire

Photo Credit: Wanda Borland 

Along with Kate Vangeloff as Dracula, you will see Abby Brown as Arthur Holmwood, Tim Coatney as Johnathan Harker, David Countiss as a variety of roles, Nathan Green as Dr. Van Helsing, Brandon Kinsey as Quincy Morris, Andrew McGill as Renfield, Alayah McNamara as Victoire, RuRu Painter as Carmilla, Amelia Rose as Lilith, Elle Schechter as a variety of roles, Tiffany Schechter as Dr. Jack Seward, Tasia Simon as Mama Westenra, Raven Slayton as a variety of roles, Kate Southern as Mina Murray,  and Jessica "Jae" Unker as Lucy Westerna.  Each performer shines within their roles and stuns the audience with a winning, truthful performance.

Behind the scenes, such talents helped unfold the performance, as Sharif Abdulraham as Director of Production, James DeDekais as Musical Director, J.Sincere Gustin Sr as Sound Technician, Jacob Kuhl as Sound Designer, Nathan Ynacay as Costume and Set Designer, with Amanda Haverick and Pidge Miller as stage manager and assistant stage manager.

The show opened this weekend and runs through July 18th.  For more information, check out the website: https://www.wanderlusttheatre.co/  as well as follow on Facebook and Instagram.

Place

 

"It's the 'Place' of Oregon that means the most.  We must, first and foremost, cherish the 'Place'. All other good things will follow if we recognize the special beauty of Oregon first in our planning, if we revere the magic, if we protect the quality."--Tom McCall, 1970

Throughout my life, certain places have been a highlight of particular seasons of my life.  In recent times, within the last ten years or so, I have experienced fore-shadowing, of such, of the significance of certain places whose experience I have yet to behold. 

One such place is a little winery in Ruch, Oregon called LongSword Winery.  

The Story Of My Life

You're the story of my life

And every word is true

Each chapter sings your name

Each page begins with you

It's the story of our times

And never letting go

And if I die today

I wanted you to know

When I had only recently returned to life in Oregon in 2011, as a fresh bride and newly-wed with high hopes of wedded bliss and the happily ever after,  my husband would drive me out to the Applegate region of Southern Oregon to visit some ne-er-do-well type friends of his of whom we'd spend the night in secretive revelry.  Our journeys would take us past this winery and I would, for reasons unbeknownst to myself at the time, make a mental note of its place.

As time unfolded through my not so wedded bliss life, I would find in my husband one such of extremity of toxic abuse stemming from his undiagnosed paranoid schizophrenia that my dreams of living the socially acceptable life of the husband, the 2.5 kids, and white picket fence would all to swiftly be smashed in the ruins of my own daily struggles against his railed abuses.  Even before walking down the aisle towards life with him, I had spent years within the confines of a church not unlike a cult in some ways, as well as with others in my life, whose constant presence in my life did its best to devalue and destroy my inner sense of trust of my own ability and self worth.  Thus, I was prime fodder for my husband's destruction of my soul.

So, back then when I traveled past Longsword and other places which would hitherto become essential to my evolution, as a timid shell of a human looking out at the world with diminishing hope and an increasing lack of self worth, I could never imagine that the slight steps I was then taking, auditioning for a few plays, would lead me forward on a journey towards freedom from the abuse, healing through the divorce into relationships that would uplift, not destroy.  Through these strengthening me, I would increase, not decrease.

The journey would lead me to the year 2018 where I would audition for a play directed by my friend, Madeline DeCourcey, who at the time our connection had been minimal but would thereafter deepen in the ascending years to follow.  And, that audition would lead to the casting that would put me in contact with friend, Jae Unker, whose presence in my life would invite me to join her in the building up of a new theatre (Wanderlust Theatre Company) in the Applegate Valley, located at none other than Longsword Winery.

Once arriving at Longsword Winery, it would take some time before I recalled that frightened child of a woman traveling by making a mental note but once done I marveled at the journey and the realization of the Universe's guidance towards this place.  

In this place, this winery, I would become a lost boy, flying about with this new colorful family through the adventure of Neverland and beyond, beyond into the increasing development of my self worth.  

Throughout the separation of the great quarantine of 2020, their presence would remain albeit removed, not to detract, destroy, but to be an ever present reminder of the true purpose of real friendship, one's chosen family.

In this photo seen above, I sit at the read-thru of the next production of Wanderlust Theatre Company's showcases, Dracula.  I am not attending as an actor, as I have stepped back from that, a reality that seems at once strange yet natural to my growth as human and artist.  No, instead I am present as a documentarian, something my heart has longed to showcase in every play I have been a part of, and as I sit there, cross-legged, masked to protection, camera at the ready, marveling at the building up of chosen family to uplift, empower, and with that, I send the message of promise to my younger frightened self of 2011.  She will be freed and increasingly so, both external and internal, and the places she is led will be the catapult to define her soul's journey and evolution. 

In My Life

There are places I'll remember

All my life though some have changed

Some forever, not for better

Some have gone and some remain

All these places have their moments

With lovers and friends I still can recall

Some are dead and some are living

In my life I've loved them all

Wanderlust Theatre Company Means To Inspire Connection

Jessica "Jae" Unker, one of the founders & producers of Wanderlust Theatre Company

Nestled in the heart of the Applegate Valley, just outside of Ruch, Oregon, the happy, little winery of LongSword rests and it is there where Southern Oregon's newest, burgeoning theatre company holds its productions.  The theatre is Wanderlust Theatre Company and was founded by Jessica "Jae" Unker, Nathan Green, and Kate Vangeloff. Still in their infancy as a production company, however, these three are no stranger to the professional theatre world, having been in and out of the realm across the country in a variety of means, from acting, marketing, to directing.  

LongSword Winery

In 2019, they launched their first production with "Neverland", an original adaptation of the classic story of Peter Pan.  Wanderlust asserts its difference in Southern Oregon from other theatres because not only is it held in the natural, rural environment but the actor and audience voyage together through the landscape, touching in a very real way the story.  Together, the actor and the audience are joined in the immediacy of the story unfolding, in a fashion that is truly up close and personal, dynamic and alive, leaving no room for complacency.  

This summer 2021 they will birth their second production with an original adaptation of "Dracula", starring Kate Vangeloff as Dracula and directed by Nathan Green and Madeline DeCourcey.  A delightfully talented, passionately committed, and ethically minded cast rounds out the story with equally passionate and dedicated crew.  Three different sets will help to birth the story as audiences travel between as the story unfolds.  Look for such rising and upcoming Southern Oregon talent as Jessica "Jae" Unker, Kate Southern, Nathan Green, Abby Brown, Amelia Rose, RuRu Painter, Raven J. Slayton, Brandon Kinsey, Andrew McGill, Tim Coatney, Tiffany Schechter, Elle Schechter, and Tasia Simon.

Amelia Rose & Michael Meyer at Dracula auditions

Wanderlust Theatre Company prides itself on being a company resting between community theatre and professional theatre, perhaps, "professional community" is an apt description.  The heart of the founders is to inspire and educate amateur actors on what it means to truly be professional, working actors while staying true to the core of creativity and art.    Thus, the artistic creation and helping to inspire connection within the community is vastly more important than notoriety and fame.  

As I sat down with Jae Unker at the Dracula auditions, she told me that what they look for in an actor are those willing to play, to give of themselves freely and with full commitment, and to come alongside the rest of the cast in a true familial ensemble.

To reflect on the idea of the thriving artist, Jae believes that to thrive is to be fully alive and to abide constantly within your art, no matter the circumstance, to be truly exploring, sharing, and helping to inspire growth and change through creativity in their community and the greater reality.

Wanderlust Theatre Company's Dracula opens June 11, 2021 and runs through July 18, 2021.  For more information on WTC, head over to: 

Wanderlust Theatre Company

https://www.facebook.com/wanderlusttheatreOR

Support Wanderlust!

The Dracula Production team, (l to r), Kate Southern, Madeline DeCourcey, Sharif Abdulrahman, Kate Vangeloff, and Nathan Green. 

Tootles: Divine Masculine Meets Divine Feminine

Me as Tootles from Wanderlust Theatre Company's debut

production of Neverland

Amongst my many soul searching quests these last few years, I have done the inner work of seeking to know the realness of the divine as masculine and feminine.  As most of the readers know, I spent a degree of my youth in and around the fundamentalist denomination, Calvary Chapel, and part of my deconstruction of that worldview has been how do I understand this notion of divine and what spiritual path to follow now that I no longer view life as a Christian.  (A side note: I still believe Jesus is the shit and worthy of respect based on his own teachings and viewpoints found not just in the bible but in many a variety of spiritual texts and understandings.)  

All that to be said, I have listened to a ton of podcasts and read a ton of books that express the notion that the divine contains both masculine and feminine.  In my past when I labeled God as "He", I would experience push back from others who believed the divine to be feminine.  My thinking at the time and today is that the divine is not merely both but similarly above and beyond that which we know as our limited gender binary system.  This is truly reflected in society's changing belief in the conformity of both male and female as many express themselves as nonbinary, transgender, and the like.  This is progress and as all change warrants is a transition that causes some upheaval yet that turmoil will result in a new healthier world.  I applaud those that express and come out as the journey in this lifetime for all of us is to express and be fully and authentically ourselves, however that may be.

Last summer, I had the honor to be cast as Tootles, the Lost Boy in the debut production of Wanderlust Theatre Company's "Neverland", an adaptation of Peter Pan.  The actor preparation started before I was given the part as I reflected on what it meant for me, a very cis-gender female, to be portraying a little boy.  Even more interesting to reflect on was that a few months earlier I had the experience of performing in three different productions (two theatrical, one film based) that highlighted the character's individually and relationally of strong female empowerment and, in a very real way, was that of the divine goddess.  That spring I found myself more and more empowered by the reality of the divine feminine in all aspects of my life through that creative work.  (Still do!)

As I read both the script adaptation and the book written by J.M. Barrie, I began to see that, although Tootles was 100% a little boy, he also carried attributes within that could be considered more feminine.  Softer and a bit more fragile than his brothers, Curly and Slightly, he was often teased by his companions.  He was delighted, very fond of, and close to his Mother Wendy but equally loyal to his Father Peter, although at times they butted heads.  Although he participated in the rambunctious boy games of hunt and sport, he was not as active as those of his brothers or Peter.  He was at home with the quietude of domestic life.  He loved literature and would often spout off on long, winding monologues of Shakespeare to prove some kind of point or to relieve his anxiety, resulting in the target of his brothers' repulsion.

Tootles with his brothers, Slightly (L) played by Tiffany Schechter and Curly (R) played by

Brandon Kinsey.

It is not a positive attribute of our society that the idea of loving literature and domestic life is seen as more feminine than masculine.  Truth be told, I have many a male friend that fall into these traits, however, it must be said my male friends are those that partake in the artistic community, so there's that.   But, all that aside, I found in my journey playing Tootles, the inward discovery of the truth of the divine masculine and divine feminine living fully, uniquely, and equally within myself.  I may have a propensity to lean more towards the feminine and that is my truth, but I now see that there are positive attributes of the masculine that I know as mine.  I credit my Tootles as helping my discovery in that.

With that, my hope is that all can come to this understanding of themselves, whether it be within the construct of divine or just the freedom to understand both aspects of gender within themselves and then be able to live that fully and truthfully.  For it is true for all of us, that our most express purpose on this earth is to become wholly ourselves, authentically and truthfully.

Got thoughts on what I wrote? Comment below.  I will respond.

The Thriving Artist is a subset of Cafe-Girl Productions, Inc.  If you wish to support Cafe-Girl Productions, Inc, go to: www.patreon.com/cafegirlproductions

Good Night 2019, Welcome 2020

So, here we are, 2020. And, now I must take a moment to reflect and officially say good night to 2019.

2019, you were a great year. I learned and I grew so much. Earlier tonight at the labyrinth, I learned with what quiet strength and focus I walk now, each step is deliberate and my eyes look straight ahead with certainty even in the unknown. I have so much and so many to thank for that grace given to me. The times of (now) last year, both positive and negative, have richly strengthened me into a better version of myself, stronger, more capable, not afraid to fail, to lose....

Of the losses, I found gains, a deeper understanding of myself. In truth, throughout many times in 2019, I sat with a younger version of myself, 15, 23, 27, looked deep within her eyes, asked her what she needed, her answer was in some variation of, to be seen, to be heard, to be valued. And, I gave her that. It was the loss of Luke Perry that brought a deeper appreciation of myself, my love for Beverly Hills, 90210 long since a forbidden secret, something I was afraid to admit, but the heartbreak of his death, gave me the determination to reveal. As Tori Spelling said, "maybe going back is what we need to move forward" and as I looked back at that time, I found strength in an unlikely Goddess, I realized how much influence that show had given me in my life and even more so, that of Shannen Doherty. I believe spending time with her version of the Goddess gave me a new deeper appreciation of my power and ability to truly #fightlikeabrenda.

My understanding of self as spiritual deepened through the productions of which I was cast, specifically during the spring months through back to back performances in the Vagina Monologues, season two of Nate & Laura & How They Met, and Dixie Swim Club. Through each of these experiences, I began exploring the true meaning of the Goddess and came even closer to knowing and seeing her in all her variety. For those that shared the stage and screen with me, or who helped bring those stories to life, helped me explore the character's story and make it my own, I thank you from the very bottom of my heart through all of me, you are each a valuable facet of who I am, we are one in spirit forever.

To the characters I was given to live truthfully this year, to my Lexie, thank you for showing me that I do not have to hide any part of myself, or be ashamed of how I looked. Even though much of your life was spent trying to change, what you showed me was that truly what you valued was the inside, what mattered was who a person is at their core, and when it was necessary you were there for those you loved, without needing any fanfare. That was such a great lesson.

To my Laura Shelton, I am honored that you came from above these last two years, through my fingertips, and out onto the computer, then the screen...Its been a journey fulfilling your story, learning the lesson you have to offer...as always to be bold, to be of service to your friends, those you love, and live truthfully in your own power.

To my Tootles, my brave little lost boy who, in the end, wasn't afraid to grow up, you helped me understand a different viewpoint of the Goddess, she as Mother. Thank you for that healing. Toots, off you go to your studies, learn all you can, but never give up your childlike enthusiasm! For the Wendy Lady!!

For my Sick fam, my love for you is forever and eternal. As the song goes, I have loved you for a thousand years and will love you for a thousand more...you have my heart for all of time, never shal that change, and I will always be grateful to each of you for your healing strength helping me to find and fulfill my calling. I would not be where I am today without each of you, nor could I have made it through some very dark times.

For my Drunk Ex Pastors & Patron Friends---what's a little religious trauma among friends, huh? Truly my connection to you has made the pain a little more manageable, a little less existant. Thank you for continually showing me that I am not crazy, that I can laugh about my past self, and move onto a better, happier, healthier version of myself. I truly love you, your Sis Not In Christ, Lia.

For my Neverland fam, I will always be grateful for the adventure we took together, the lust to wander as it were, from those early days of Sunday evening workshops to grueling summer rehearsals stumbling through the newness of immersive theater, to the magical world we created, bringing the childlike discovery back to audiences, helping them to truly realize that they do not ever have to grow up. Nor do we, #nevergrowup.

For the cast of One Of Us, I cannot ever thank you enough for bringing this beloved truth of my life to the 'stage' for the first time. You touched my heart to an inner core and held me heart in place when it bled out the pain and healed.

To my new friends at Awake Cafe, I am so happy to be getting to know you. You never fail to bring a smile to my face. I love your enthusiasm and passion for life and your creativity. I look forward to more creative conversations and collaborations in 2020.

For my co-producers in crime, West, Erin, Michael, thank you for your patience, your graciousness, your listening and advice, encouragement, and mostly for your love...it has sustained me and given me the strength I need to persevere. I got you as you got me!

For Michael,I know this year has been transitional and difficult at times. Thank you for the patience and for being humble in your healing and grief. You will endure, your life does matter and have worth.

For my twin flame, that is how I address you because that is who you are and you know this. I am ever so grateful you returned to me this last year, walked into that library room that evening in January as I entered a cafe so long ago...I see now the whole point of our time at the cafe was you...even as we were separated all these years, we never really were, nor shall we ever be. It is a force deeper than either of us that pulls and binds us together, a magical entity that guides us again and again back to each other. Welcome home, my flame, welcome back to another facet of yourself. Do I know what the future will hold? I do not, but one thing is certain, our paths will ever be mingled and connected, of that I can rest assured. I love you as my own being and my own soul, for that you are. Love is not a fiery blast that overwhelms, but truly a slow smolder that never burns or fades. Once again, I am grateful I no longer have to live without you anymore.

Lastly, I thank Goddess and God for revealing the dimensions of themselves to me. For continually helping me to journey deeper and deeper within, to the true contentment of my heart that is my real home. New layers of this understanding keep unfolding as I heal and grow, finding more and more peace and focus.

Good Night, 2019. Welcome 2020! Together, let's focus & see our true power & purpose unfold.

You by A Great Big World

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