When I was a little girl in elementary school, every year we were required to do some kind of a science project to submit to the local science fair in the next town over. On the day of the science fair, we would all pile into the yellow school bus and head down to find out how our project was judged, either getting a blue for first place, a red for second, white for third, or, like, purple for the "honorable mention". As kids, we all knew the extrinsic value of each of the ribbons and that honorable mention was the "Hey, you did a thing, here's a ribbon." Even so, it did sting a little to see our friends receive some kind of 'higher award' that we, even when they, as well as the adults in our lives, tried to assure us that the aforementioned purple ribbon was just as cool. I kept all my ribbons from various childhood activities for years hanging on my corkboard above my desk in my childhood room. I can still see them today, some of them were blue, some were red, and, yeah, there were a plethora of purple.
Receiving the purple has positive and negative effects. The idea of praising a kid for trying is in itself a worthy concept of which there has had a positive influence. But, then again, there has been a bit of a backlash to the concept of "everyone gets an award" no matter what, and that is what I feel is occurring with the whole "Barbie-Gate, Oscar Snub" ordeal happening now. With the announcements of the upcoming academy award nominations, it was discovered that Margot Robbie, Barbie herself, was not nominated for best 'actress' nor Greta Gerwig for best director. Yes, Barbie is up for best picture and Margot (I'm on a first name basis) as part of the collection of "best producers", and Ryan Gosling for best actor. (Sorry about the gender distinction, btw.) Those three latter facts are darn right amazing in their own right and well deserving if the works in their favor. But, for those raised in the 'honorable mention' culture of it all it's caused an uproar and a feeling as if Margo and Greta ( I know her too) have been snubbed.
Now, let's just say this, it's pretty damn cool that Margot Robbie is nominated for 'best producer'. A woman who starred as Barbie, shedding light on the discrepancies of male to female status quo, overcoming those restrictions in herself and for others, is up for best producer. And, Ryan Gosling is well-deserving of best actor. Furthermore, Greta Gerwig is a damn talented whose career is quickly on the upswing, so guess what, the odds are high in her favor that she will win her Oscar someday. Finally, focusing on the "Barbie Oscar Snub", takes away from something more incredible and groundbreaking, that of Lilly Gladstone for best actress of "Killers Of The Flower Moon", if she does secure such, she will be the first Native American actress to do such. (She already one a golden globe by the way.)
In life, there is winning and losing for us all. As we travel the journey of our life, we are not able to choose when we win, when we lose, but rather how we view the situation, how we make lemonade out of lemons, reframe the hardship. Presently, in my own life, I have two dear friends who have lost the building of their business unaware of next steps, a woman whose grown daughter has had a recurrence of cancer, another friend who is dealing with the difficult process of dissolving her marriage, each are feeling the enormity of pain that comes from such and should, all feelings are valid and need to be fully experienced before forward movement. Thus, feeling the disappointment of any loss, including that of a treasured actress presumably not getting her due, is valid and vital to be felt. However, there are no guarantees in life, if what we hoped does not occur the way we planned. Failure only happens when we allow our disappointments and emotions to take over our actions, to wallow, to whine, to wail endlessly.
Turning our letdowns into lessons is the best pathway to overcoming, learning from the hardships is what makes us better, more well rounded human beings. And, after all, wasn't that the true message of the Barbie movie?
Think I forgot how to be happy
Something I'm not, but something I can be
Something I wait for
Something I'm made for
Something I'm made for
Billie Eilish - What Was I Made For? (Official Music Video)
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