We have come upon the culmination of year 2022 and for many it is a day of celebration and mirth, others a time of quiet meditation and reflection. For myself, I find myself leaning towards the latter with perhaps a slight tidbit of the former coming through in moments. For the most part today, I spent the day following the schedule of my own choosing, putting the necessities of work for the coming weeks aside until later in the day and only that which I felt must be done, such as this blog and the monthly newsletter. Thus, I find myself struggling to adjust the words for this entry, desiring more than anything to run towards my room scrolling through YouTube searching for some a form of distraction.
Perhaps for me there is a tinge of sadness as this year comes to a close, 2022 was a beautiful year for me, one of healing, growth, acknowledgment of past sins and amends made, immense heart-ache, but overall a year blessed and fruitful. Increasingly, I found myself leaning further into the reality of acceptance of all parts of myself, my past, present, and desires for the future. Acceptance for the ones of my past who caused some ill towards myself or others, for those who broke my heart and shattered my sense of being, yet I accept them now for the gifts they have given. For not always was our time together full of pain, but also times of joy and laughter. I accept both as spokes on the wheel that led me to my wholeness.
So many approach the New Year with the dedication of the resolution yet increasingly I find myself seeing this day as a time of quiet meditative pondering over the lessons learned throughout the passing year. For me, a resolution or intention is not made at a singular point but hourly, daily, monthly meditated and focused upon as the years unfold. As I ponder within this year fading, I celebrate the long held intentions achieved and recognize all that I still have to attain. These intentions are not birthed into being by simply saying, then believing, nay, that is only the first step. The subsequent steps are the daily actions taken reaching to a smaller goal towards the final achievement. It's all the little steps each moment taken with mindfulness that lead to success. What is success then is not the winning Oscar, the published novel, (of which all should be celebrated) but honoring all the mindful moments in movement that led to that achievement, finally reached, a sigh of relief and gratitude transpires.
This year, more than ever before, I have found peace in the knowing I am finally attaining wholeness within. More and more, I do not feel any lack within or without, giving me both a seriousness upon my desires and intentions, but also the ability to be silly and child-like in the enjoyment of each life. The true purpose of my life, then, is to continue the path towards healing for myself and those I encounter.
So, as this year reaches its culmination heading towards the cemetery of time, let all be laid down in restful slumber, carried within as tokens of lessons of maturity deepening, and as the new year dawns, awakening with the splendor and freshness of birth, let your heart continue its focus on the intentions already set, not in wishful inaction, but in the allowance of daily steps taken. For resolutions be damned, a year is a human construction of this life we spend and is somewhat meaningless in the grand scheme of all, but take with you a simple guidance to achieve with mindfulness that which you desire. May you be provided all that you need and above as you continuously focus within on your set intentions. Although there may be thousands of pathways you wish to walk down, becoming intentionally focused is the answer towards furthering your journey.
For my part, my desire in the coming year is to be more community centered and active, not where I am forced to do, but in where I feel led and comfortable. I wish to continue my journey of healing and let that be the impetus for connection with others.
Loved it! Dad
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