One Final Time

The night wore on. Ruby and Tera disappeared into the darkness of the other rooms. Geoff prattled on about how he'd met Biff, at the gym, and how completely happy he was. Les sipped leisurely on his beer and stared absentmindedly ahead of him.

“So, about you and Monica?” Geoff was asking and Les looked around at him.

“Yeah?”

“You happy with her?” Geoff questioned pointedly.

“Well, yeah sure,” Les said, staring in mock surprise at his friend. Geoff raised his friends up in the air and said,

“Hey, I'm only asking because you and Ruby were getting pretty close there,” Geoff explained.

“Yeah, well, it was nothing,” Les tried to say.

“I know you two were always, you know, had stuff going on,” Geoff continued. “But you got to put that behind you, if you can. I mean, you and Monica...unless, you don't want to, yet.”

Les looked at his friend and nodded. He slowly rose to his feet and stumbled drunkenly outwards to the swimming pool and patio. The lights were low, the water rippled a bit in the breeze. A few people soaked in the hot tub and sipped champagne joyfully, flirting with one another. Looking around, Les realized that what he was looking for he could not find. Ruby was nowhere in sight. He moved back inside and began moving through the down-stair rooms, searching for her among the many partiers. Some glanced over at him, eyes glazed over from their liquid high and then back at their companions. Les found Biff and Geoff sitting on the front patio, sipping their wine and pouring more when not nearly enough empty. Les sat, dejectedly, beside them. Geoff absentmindedly handed him the bottle of wine and he took a big swig out of it.

“Hey, Geoff, what was that song that Ruby was singing tonight?” Biff wanted to know, leaning against his boyfriend drunkenly.

“Exactly which one, hon, she sang a lot,” Geoff asked for clarification.

“You know the one that goes, “hmmmm, something something,” Biff tried to explain.

“Oh, Linger, why do you ask?” Geoff asked, putting his arm around Biff and kissing his cheek.

“How does it go?” Biff looked up at his lover, his eyes slanted with the weight of the alcohol.

“Okay, repeat after me, It starts like, “Hmmm, I want to linger,” Geoff began and Biff warbled out, “Hmm, I want to linger” right after him.

“Hmmm, A little longer,” went Geoff and Biff repeated him. “Hmmm, A little longer.”

“I said that,” said Biff, confusedly.

“No, you repeat it, okay?”

“Oh,” smiled Biff. “Hmm, A little longer.”

“Here with you,” Geoff said and kissed Biff.

“Here with you,” repeated Biff. With the wine bottle between his legs, Les looked up at the sky as his friends warbled on with that old familiar song.

“Hmmm, It's such a perfect night,” Geoff went on and Biff repeated him.

“Hmmm, It doesn't seem quite right,” went Geoff with Biff as his echo.

“Hmmm, That this should be,” sang Geoff and Biff followed suit. “My last with you.”

Les sat up and looked around at his friend, sharply. He bit his lip, took a gulp of the wine, for courage.

“Hey, Geoff,” he began. Geoff and Biff looked hazily over at their friend.

“Yeah?”

“I know what you were saying back there, about me and Monica, and me and Ruby,” Les said. “I get it, I know what to do.”

“Yeah, well better make your move fast, I think I saw Tera and Ruby heading to Tera's car a few minutes ago,” Geoff answered and patted his friend on his back, knocking him to his feet, and grabbing the wine bottle just before it fell. As Les moved down the driveway, Geoff and Biff continued the song.

“Hmmm, And come September,” sang Geoff with his echo came Biff right behind.

“Hmmm, I will remember,” sang Geoff remembering as Biff followed him. “Hmmm, Our Scouting days, Of friendships true.”

Les found his way through the maze of cars parked on the long driveway, anxiously looking for Tera's vehicle. He could barely hear as Geoff and Biff finished the song.

“Hmmm, And as the years go by, Hmmm, I'll think of you and sigh. Hmmm, This is good night, And not good bye. Hmmm I want to linger, Hmmm A little longer, Hmmm A little longer,Here with you,” They sang, first Geoff and then Biff following.

They fell silent as they finished and then Biff said, “What's that one part about the last line? It kept running through my head, so tragic!”

At the end of the driveway, Les saw the car pulling away, Tera driving and Ruby in the passenger side.

“Ruby! Ruby! Wait!” he called. “Tera! Tera, stop! Jewels! Jewels!”

In the distance, back at the house, Geoff sang to Biff:

“Hmmm, It's such a perfect night. Hmmm, It doesn't seem quite right. Hmmm, That this should be, My last with you.”

Linger

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One Final Time

Part Three

Four years flew by as a thief of time steals away the hours, Les found himself approaching law school graduation and the final approach to adulthood. With Monica by his side these last few years, he had begun the ascent into the next frontier with a spring in his step and a positive look forward. Yet, still the memories of the care-free youth haunted him. Deep inside, he felt a loss of self, a sense of disappointment in who he was becoming, not being true to the person he was on the inside.

Outwardly, everything appeared to be peachy keen and falling into place. He and Monica had gotten a place in Laguna Niguel, beautiful and looking over the ocean. How they had managed that was based on careful financial planning and loving help from family. They took trips up north to Sonoma County to see his family, toured the wineries, and had tastings. They had friends over once a week for board games and movie nights. He joined the gym and took up racket ball. Tucked away in his locked glove compartment was a shiny diamond ring just waiting for the moment when he could kneel before Monica, asking for her hand in marriage in a perfectly planned and timed romantic moment. Everything was falling into place and everything was perfect.

So, why did he feel, at times, so miserable and, dare he say, alone?

Late one night, in their computer room and study, he sat book before him, trying to find the energy and sense of purpose to study for his impending exams. Distractedly, he scanned the screen of facebook, clicking over to his email when he heard the familiar ping of the incoming message.

The message read:

“Hi all you Crowshaven fam,

I'm in Los Angeles this weekend...guess what? I'm opening for Jewel! I know, right? Its pretty amazing! I'd love for you all to come, backstage passes & everything! Write back if you can make it & I'll send you all the info.

Can't wait to see you all,

Your Jewel(S)”

And, that was it. He hesitated to hit reply but found his fingers clicking the button on the mouse before he could stop himself. Her response was swift, happily detailing the information about the locale of the concert, times, and places. Although it was an email, he still could not see any hint of excitement or emotion other than that of an old friend to another. He took down the information on a piece of paper, tore it, and placed it discreetly in a secluded pocket of his brief-case. Why, he did not know, but he felt the need to keep this and Ruby a secret from Monica.

He left his house about 6:00 in the evening and headed for the nearby subway. He was meeting Geoff and his new partner, Biff, at a Starbucks near the venue, they'd carpool there together. He could not remember when he'd seen any of these people, the last time he'd even talked to anyone from camp was that late night phone call years back with Ruby herself. And, now here she was front-lining for Jewel.

Later, Geoff, Biff, and Les crowded into Geoff's small blue VW bug and headed over to the concert hall. Tera was awaiting them outside and hugs were passed all around.

As they sat side by side in the auditorium, they held their breaths as the lights descended and ascended on the stage, with the entrance of Ruby Rhodes, wearing a strapless sun-dress and carrying only her guitar. She stood in the center of the stage and began playing her original songs. New songs he had yet to hear and songs that sounded so very familiar.

“I'd like to start out with a song that's very special to me because it reminds me of a very special time and a very special place in my life, it reminds me of the value of friendship, loyalty, honesty, love, and truthfulness to yourself, and its a blend of a variety of different songs I've heard or written throughout my life, I call it “Summer Love,” she began and started strumming chords and began to sing out:

“Just a boy and a girl in a little canoe, with the moon shining bright and clear,

Hmmm, I want to linger.

And as the boy paddled he said, you better kiss me or get out and swim,

Hmmm, It's such a perfect night.

So what you gonna do in a little canoe, with the moon shining bright,

and the boy, and the boy, and the boy

Hmmm, And come September,

The girl is paddling now, paddling now, paddling now,

All alone

Hmmm, And as the years go by,

The boy is swimming, swimming, swimming

Farther into the distance

Hmmm I want to linger.

Hmmm, A little longer.
Hmmm, A little longer,
Here with you.
Hmmm, It doesn't seem quite right.
Hmmm, That this should be,
My last with you.
Hmmm, I will remember,
Hmmm, Our Scouting days,
Of friendships true.
Hmmm, I'll think of you and sigh.
Hmmm, This is good night
And not good bye.
Hmmm A little longer.
Hmmm A little longer,
Here with you.

Ruby smiled at the audience as they cheered loudly in appreciation for her beautiful work. As the applause died down, she began another song, this one with out explanation and Les felt the longing, the loss coupled with desire, painfully coming across in her voice.

“There was a girl named yellow, her name was yellow, and all she ever knew was what she saw.

But then one day everything changed.

She made some friends, a girl named Blue, a boy named Red

They played, they played, they played.

One day she saw what she was afraid to see, she was different.

Blue touched her and she turned green, green, green

Red touched her and she turned orange, orange, orange

And she never was the same, never was the same

But long after they'd left, in her heart they remained,

Forever changed she was, not just yellow, but a rainbow.

I'm a rainbow now, through the tears I've shed for you, have made me something new,

I'm a rainbow now, stronger than I was before, fighting for my dream ever-more

I'm rainbow now, that's all I'll ever be, all that you'll ever need to know

A rainbow, A rainbow, A rainbow

The lights dimmed and the audience was still a moment, reflecting in the magic of that last song. Then the lights rose and the emcee announced her name and cheers from the audience went up. None louder than the three people in the audience, Geoff, Les, and Tera who knew the true origins of the songs and the reasons behind their words.

As Jewel entered the stage and the young teenage and twenty-something girls shrieked with delight, Les and his friends made their way to the backstage entrance, showing their passes and being let behind the scenes. Ruby ran to them, her arms wide and her eyes bright.

“Oh my god,” shrieked Tera, almost as loud as the girls out front and hugged her friend.

“You were a-mazing!” Geoff announced, in his flamboyant fashion. Ruby hugged him and introduced herself to Biff with a warm hug. She turned to Les and looked up at him, biting her lip in a way that made her more desirable. Any thought of Monica flew quickly out of his mind as he looked down at what could have been at one time his childhood sweetheart, the girl who got away.

“You guys want to come back here and have a glass of champagne with me?” She smiled and tentatively reached for his hand. He took it and she led him and the others back to a back room that was decked out with Jewel's entourage, a table full of food, and a table full of different types of beverages, alcoholic and non-alcoholic. Ruby secured a bottle of champagne for them and led them to a corner area with arm-chairs and a sofa. She sat, and skillfully popped the cork off the bottle without spilling any of the drink, and poured it around to the glasses already on the table between the chairs.

“To success,” toasted Tera towards Ruby as she raised her glass.

“To us,” Ruby corrected her. “And for Crowshaven.”

They all toasted to that and drank.

“So, what exactly is Crowshaven?” Biff wanted to know and looked eagerly at Geoff.

“Uh, oh, you haven't told him yet,” smirked Ruby. Les noticed how comfortable she appeared with herself, something she hadn't been in years past. “You haven't outed your geeky past yet, huh?”

“Oh no, what is it?” Biff's eyes widened and his eyebrows raised in mirth.

“So, I was a junior counselor at a Y-camp when I was in high school,” began Geoff. “And, it was called Crowshaven, and I met all these guys there, they were counselors with me.”

“Junior counselors, huh?” Biff laughed. “Sounds similar to what I did, the Boys & Girls Club.”

“Really?” Geoff was surprised and pleased. They chinked their glasses and kissed on the lips in congratulatory pleasure in sharing a similar childhood past-time.

“So, I bet you all have such crazy stories to tell,” Biff said looking round at the rest of them. “Come on, don't be shy, do tell!”

“There was the one time that guy, “Bliss”, his camp name, Biff, scored some weed and we all got high and broke into the cafeteria late at night,” Geoff began.

“Oh god yeah,” Les continued. “We had the munchies so bad, and then Jewels ate all the peanut butter!”

“Well, I was hungry!” exclaimed Ruby, or Jewels.

“For peanut butter?” Les looked over at her and winked. She smiled at him and he scooted himself just a big closer to her.

“Wait, whose Jewels?” Biff was confused.

“That was my camp name,” Ruby began to explain. “They used to call me...well, our friend, Jess, used to say, “ Emerald, Diamond, Sapphire, Ruby, Jewels, and Jewels just stuck!”

“And you just opened for Jewel tonight!” Biff said excitedly.

“Yeah, its like fate or something, right?” Ruby laughed and chinked her glass with Biff.

“So did you all have nicknames or something?” Biff looked around.

“Well,” Les began slowly. “They called me Trip, all because of that boyfriend of yours.”

“Boyfriend?” Biff looked at Geoff and smiled. “Yeah, I'll buy that. But, how'd he get the nickname Trip?”

“I'm not supposed to say,” Geoff started to say. “But, um, he used to get all trippy about stuff, so Trip just stuck,”

“What about you two?” Biff asked, nodding towards Geoff and Tera.

Tera shook her head. “I never acquired a nick-name, it was optional for junior counselors, I was always just Tera.”

“The best Tera ever!” rang out Ruby and raised her glass to her friend.

Later, after Jewel had finished her set, they followed her entourage to her nearby home where the celebration continued in a quiet yet festive fashion. There was light music for dancing, a hot tub to soak in, and plenty of room to mill about and chat with one another.

Les and Ruby found themselves alone, at last, in a dark corner of the living room, glasses of red wine on the table before them, their hands found one another's and held on tight. Without a thought of anyone or anything else in their room, they put their heads close to one another and found a closeness they had both been desiring since that long ago night at camp. 

Les teased Ruby about the songs she'd sung, saying "Sounded a bit familiar, but I liked the new twist on them."

"Thanks," Ruby smiled up at him, snuggling against him further.  

"You missed one though, maybe next time?"

"Yeah, what's the song?"

"What's your name, little girl?" Les began softly.

"Oh, but it starts with the girl singing," Ruby teased him.  

"Oh, right!"

"What's your name, little boy?" Ruby started singing.

"My name is Lemme," Les responded.

"Lemme what, little boy?"

"Lemme kiss you," Les responded. "What's your name, little girl?"

"My name is Ida," Ruby responded sharply.

"Ida what, little girl?" 

"Ida wanna!" Ruby answered.  "What's your name, little boy?"

"My name is Lemme," Les smiled.

"Lemme what, little boy?"

"Lemme kiss you," Les pleaded.  "What's your name, little girl?"

"My name's Alaska," replied Ruby.

"Alaska what, Little girl?" Les wanted to know.

"Alaska my momma!" Ruby smiled in her answer.  "What's your name, little boy?"

"My name is Lemme."

"Lemme what, little boy?"

"Lemme kiss you!" Les pleaded.  "What's your name, little girl?"

"My name is Ollie," Ruby said shyly.

"Ollie what, little girl?"

"Ollie right!" Ruby smiled.

As their lips drew close to one another, the couch cushion beside them bounced upwards and Geoff drunkenly wanted to know,

“So, Les, how's Monica?”

Les pulled away, but tried to maintain his grasp on Ruby's hand. His mind was frantic as to what to say or do. His whole life, or what he had built it to be, outside this moment was coming back to him.

“Monica?” Ruby asked, a tremor in her voice.

“Um, yeah, um,” Les began. “She's kind of...my girl-friend, yeah.”

“Oh,” Ruby began, pulling her hand from his and sitting up. “Oh.”

She got up and stumbled over towards Tera, leaning into her friend and whispering. Tera put her arms around Ruby and glanced over her shoulder, eyeing Les with disapproval.

Linger by The Cranberries

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One Final Time

The next day, Gadget picked them up in the camp bus from their camping site. As they rolled up their sleeping bags and re-packed their backpacks, Jewels noticed Les kept to himself, lost in thought, amidst the laughter and good cheer of the other counselors. Stories we're passed back and forth, inside jokes we're built that years to come would still bring mirth to those involved, and plans for the upcoming rest of the week we're laid out. But, Les worked by himself, pondering his next move. Beside him, albeit silent, Jess packed. Although she did not speak, he could tell from her steely looks that she was not too pleased with him. Perhaps his harmless flirting with the other female counselors hadn't been taken so well by her, or maybe it was the kiss...that kiss so long in coming, it seemed almost forbidden, and now it had happened at last, what was to follow? Les held himself back from looking over at Jewels, but as always could feel her presence inside his heart, something he could not truly understand or had ever experienced.

Gadget greeted them individually as they boarded the bus and pulled away from their site, heading back to Camp Crowshaven. Their day away from work had been a well-appreciated reward but now it was time to return to their duties. The radio played songs they had not heard since leaving their lives back home. Les sat in the back of the bus near the window, Jess sat beside him looking straight ahead. He tried to think of some way to begin some sort of conversation with her, some way to figure out what to do next in this thing called a relationship they had together.

Tera and Jewels sat side by side, heads close together, whispering over the events of the night before.

“So, he kissed you?” mouthed Tera, trying to draw out more information.

“Yeah,” blushed Jewels and ducked her head lower.

“And then?”

“That's all, then Rainbow called us back,” Jewels reported.

“Have you guys talked at all today?” Tera wanted to know.

“No,” Jewels shook her head and then bit her lip, anxiously.

Later, after they had returned to camp and finished the dinner and their campers played away the evening until campfire, Jewels sat on the steps of the dining hall watching the camp before her. Les approached and quietly sat beside her. She said nothing but waited for him, whatever he would say. He got up and stood in front of her.

“Jewels, I've been thinking,” He began cautiously, eyeing her for information.

“Yeah, what is it, Trip?” she said peering up at him, anxiously yet hopefully.

“So, last night,” he began. “What happened between us...its just that...”

“Yeah?” Jewels asked, drawing him out.

“I think...let's just remain friends, okay?” he eyed her, looking her over, wanting more, wanting her to stand up and fight for him, for them. She sighed, looked down at her dirty feet caked with dust, feet that were never clean, then looked back at him and gave her best “that's okay with me” smile.

“Sure thing,” she finally answered. He nodded and leaned over, awkwardly giving her a hug.

Pulling back, he said, “I'll see you around, okay?”

She nodded and off he headed. She bit her lip, fighting back the tears from leaving her eyes, and clasped her hands together. Come on, Ruby, she thought, he's just one guy, it doesn't matter anyway.

Linger

One Final Time

Les lay on his back, Pink Floyd filling his blazed brain as well as his room, Jess lay on the bed beside him, stoned as well. They'd been hanging out fairly regularly since that day they met at the mall and went to Mickey's house. Their schools were fairly close and a bus ride was the shortest distance between their destinations. With eyes mostly closed, Les felt the nearness of her, could feel her soft breathing by his side, and found himself growing excited. She let out a sigh beside him and he turned to face her.

“Um, Jess,” he began, brokenly. “There is something I've been meaning to ask you.”

Jess turned on her side to face him.

“Yes?” she said, her blue eyes getting large and sparkly. “What is it?

“Well, when we were with Mickey that one time, the first time,” he began. “You said something that was, I don't know, kind of weird.”

“Yeah, what?”

“Well, he asked if we were together,” he began. “And, you said that we just got together.”

“Yeah, so?”

“So, I mean, why?” Les wanted to know.

“Well, um, see Mickey always liked me and I really don't, so I just said that to, kind of, get him off my back for awhile,” She said quickly. “That's all...I mean, I didn't mean to offend you or anything.”

“Oh so,” Les started, then stopped, then began again. “So, you didn't mean anything by it?”

“Like what?” Jess said, innocently.

“Like do you like me, you know?”

“As more than a friend?” Jess asked.

“Um, yeah...,” Les trailed off.

“Maybe,” she smiled and turned over on her back, but kept her head turned towards him. “What about you?”

“Maybe,” was all Les could say and he felt the urge increasing inside of him to kiss her. She smiled at him, invitingly. “So, what now?” he began and then Jess leaned over and let her lips touch his barely before pulling away.

“So, maybe that's more than maybe,” she smiled, pulling away. “Maybe I liked you since camp, you know.”

“Wow,” was all Les could say, smiling. Then the phone rang. He didn't move to answer it. It rang three times and Les could hear his mother in the other room answering it. A few minutes passed it seemed, and then they heard her calling for him.

“Les, phone for you!”

Les got up slowly and moved towards the door.

“I'll be right back,” he said, smiling in what he hoped was a seductive fashion at Jess. She nodded in return and rolled over on her side, her eyes closed.

Les padded down the hallway in his socked feet and into the kitchen, where his mother held the portable phone in front of her. He took it from her, hoping not to appear to stoned, in a silent thank you.

“Hello?” he said into the speaker. A tiny girlish voice answered his.

“Um, hi,” was all it said. It took a full minute for Les to register the familiarity of the voice during which time his heart started racing, in excitement as much as confusion. Finally, he said,

“Ruby?”

“Um, yeah,” she began. “I finally called you, sorry its been so long, I've been...busy.”

That was only partially true, Ruby was thinking, mostly she was just too nervous to call him. What if he didn't feel the same?

“Hi,” he smiled into the phone at last but then he remembered Jess and looked towards his room down the long hallway. “Well, how are you?”

“I'm doing fine,” she began. “So...um, you?”

“Yeah, good,” he started, and then moved towards the sliding glass door, opened it, and stepped out into the early spring evening coolness. “Sorry, I'm just really baked right now.”

“Oh, its okay,” she said. “Just wanted to know if you wanted to hang out sometime or...”

“Um, yeah, yeah, I'd like that.”

“So?”

“So?”

“Um, when?” Ruby finally asked.

“Um, you know, I'm kind of busy right now with school and...stuff, so I'll call you, okay?”

“Um, okay, sounds good,” Ruby began and then remembered, “You have my number, right?”

“Yeah, I think so and if not, I'll just call you,” which sounded reasonable to Les but Ruby asked, “Wait, how, what?”

He saw his error and then said, “Um, yeah give it to me.”

He moved back into the warm kitchen and dining room linoleum floored rooms and grabbed a pen and paper.

“Are you ready?” She asked and he gave a “Uh-huh” as the affirmative. “Okay, its 857-9128, you may have to dial 1 first, so...”

“Got it,” Les said and then fell silent. Did he want to get off the phone with her? Could he think of anything more to keep her on the line? His mind raced while he realized Jess was waiting for him, on the bed, for what? Where was that going anyway? Finally he breathed out, “So, I'll call you soon, okay?”

“Sure thing,” she answered. “Bye now.”

They hung up and Les returned the phone to hits holder and walked back into the room. Jess was sitting up on the bed and smiled up at him when he entered.

“So, who was that?” she wanted to know.

“Oh, it was Ruby,” he answered and sat beside her.

“Oh,” was all she said. They were both silent and the Pink Floyd CD changed its song. Jess walked over and turned it down, stared at him for a few minutes with her arms folded.

He looked over at her, not sure what, if anything, was wrong or if he did anything or even what he should do if he had. He waited in what seemed like forever.

“Do you like her?” Jess finally broke the awkwardness. Les looked up at her, confused, because he didn't really know the answer to that.

“How do you mean?” was all he could say.

“Well, do you like her more than friends or...,” Jess began and let her words trail off.

“I don't know,” was all he could answer.

“Well, maybe you need to figure that out,” she said and grabbed her bag and headed out the bedroom door. So, was that it? Should he follow her? Let her go? His stoned brain was reeling with all that had happened, his heart in confusion. He got up and followed her out the front door, to the walkway. She turned and looked him over.

“Just call me, when you get things figured out, okay?” then she turned and headed down the block towards the bus-stop.   

Linger